Markets Crash on Pictures of Obama Losing Shirt

Shirtless President-elect Creates Crisis of Confidence


Global markets swooned today in reaction to photos showing that President-elect Barack Obama had lost his shirt.

The pictures depicting a shirtless Mr. Obama wandering about on a deserted stretch of beach stoked fears that the U.S.’s financial woes were deeper than previously reported.

“We have had a steady drumbeat of bad news about the U.S. economy for weeks now,” said Tracy Klugian, global asset analyst for HSBC.  “Learning that the President-elect no longer has a shirt to his name was the last thing these markets needed.”

In an attempt to calm investors. Obama press secretary Robert Gibbs said that the President-elect still owned a shirt and denied rumors that Mr.Obama had invested funds with Bernie Madoff.

 

Email This Story to a Friend


©2010 Borowitz Report.com Home |  Subscribe |  Unsubscribe |  RSS |  Archives |  Syndicate |  Contact