President Barack Obama picked up support for his stimulus package from an unexpected source today as Yankee slugger Alex Rodriguez said that he was “totally in favor of stimulus.”
“Sometimes when you have to get the job done, you need a shot in the arm,” said Mr. Rodriguez at a press conference in the parking lot of Yankee Stadium. “This stimulus sounds like it could be that injection.”
The slugger, known to his fans and detractors alike as A-Rod, said that the U.S. economy may not seem very muscular at the moment, but that “juicing the economy” could change that overnight.
“Mark my words,” he said. “If the economy gets the right injection, its muscles will bulge to monstrous proportions.”
Mr. Rodriguez’s words were in stark contrast with remarks made last week by another athlete, swimmer Michael Phelps, who said that the economy “just needs to chill.”
“As far as the economy goes, I’m comfortably numb about it,” Mr. Phelps said. “Dude, did I just say that out loud?”
At his press conference today, Mr. Rodriguez bristled when asked questions about steroid use, at one point throwing a car at a reporter.
CHARLESTON, SC (The Borowitz Report) – In a sign o... [ + ]
SOUTH CAROLINA (The Borowitz Report) – Republican presidential frontrunner Mitt Romney ha... [ + ]
PYONGYANG (The Borowitz Report) – The following is a letter from Kim Jong-un, Supreme Leader of North ... [ + ]
BRUSSELS (The Borowitz Report) – In what many are hailing as a breakthro... [ + ]
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)– The following is a letter released today by Lloyd Blankfe... [ + ]
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – In what stock market analysts are pointing to as a rare bright spot i... [ + ]
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) Marking the withdrawal of the final US troops from Ira... [ + ]
JEFFERSON CITY, MO (The Borowitz Report) - A rabid Doberman Pinscher jumped on stage at a Tea Party rall... [ + ]
On MSNBC’s Morning Joe, Andy Borowitz talks about his new book, The 50 Funniest American Writers.
Andy in NYC, 5/18/11