Sanford: ‘I’m Too Sexy For My State’

Latest Statement Stirs Controversy


Lashing out at critics who have called for his resignation, an unrepentant Gov. Mark Sanford released a statement today indicating that he might be “too sexy” for his critics to handle.

“I’m too sexy for my state, too sexy for my state, so sexy I can’t wait,” the statement read in full.

Mr. Sanford’s latest outburst has motivated an “emergency intervention” on the part of two former elected officials, former Gov. Elliot Spitzer of New York and former Sen. John Edwards of North Carolina.

“What we did was wrong, but at least we shut our fucking pieholes about it,” Mr. Spitzer said.  More Andy Borowitz here.

New National Bestseller from Andy Borowitz!  Who Moved My Soap? The CEO’s Guide to Surviving in Prison: The Bernie Madoff Edition on sale for only $9.95!

 


©2012 Borowitz Report.com Home |  Subscribe |  Unsubscribe |  RSS |  Archives |  Contact
Powered by Rubenstein Technology Group