WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) – Just moments after she broke with fellow Republicans and voted in favor of health care reform, Sen. Olympia Snowe (R-ME) came under fire from the GOP for allegedly lying about her nation of birth.
“This vote is going to raise suspicions, once again, that Sen. Snowe was born in Kenya,” said GOP Chairman Michael Steele. “We demand that she prove, once and for all, that she is definitely not Kenyan.”
Orly Taitz, leader of the so-called “birther” movement, said that Sen. Snowe’s vote was “textbook Kenyan” behavior: “She’s putting her tribe first.”
In other news, conservative radio host Rush Limbaugh said he would acquire the St. Louis Rams and rename their stadium The House of Painkillers.
Limbaugh’s move came after a failed bid to acquire Minnesota’s NFL franchise and rename it the Minnesota Vicodins.
Elsewhere, the Rev. Moon married 10,000 people, putting him slightly ahead of Liza Minnelli. More here.
DETROIT (The Borowitz Report) – General Motors’ decision yesterday to stop manufacturing Hummers has struck at the heart of the group who loved the vehicles most: America’s assholes. Across t... [ + ]
SILICON VALLEY (The Borowitz Report) – A new social network is about to alter the playing field of the social media world, and it’s called PhoneBook. According to its creators, who invented the... [ + ]
Andy Borowitz live in New York, 7/2/09
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