The Borowitz Report

The Borowitz Report

Americans Switch from Washington Post Subscription to Gummies

Nov 07, 2024
∙ Paid
1,187
303
86
Share
WaPo owner Jeff Bezos has been “totally helpless” to stop the flight to gummies, sources said. (Photo by Alex Wong/Getty Images)

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Hundreds of thousands of Americans who until recently subscribed to the Washington Post are now receiving a monthly supply of gummies instead, sources confirmed on Thursday.

WaPo owner Jeff Bezos…

This post is for paid subscribers

Already a paid subscriber? Sign in
© 2025 Andy Borowitz
Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start writingGet the app
Substack is the home for great culture