Clarence Thomas Fears Volatile Stock Market Could Force Billionaire Hosts to Sell Their Yachts
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a rare public statement, Clarence Thomas warned on Thursday that the whipsawing stock market could force billionaires who have hosted him and Samuel Alito on luxury cruises to sell their yachts.
“I usually bite my tongue, but the threat to these cruises impels me to speak out,” he said. “There…