Desperate Trump Tries To Fix Plunging Stock Price With Sharpie

A Sharpie much like the one Trump used, according to sources. (Brett Jordan on Unsplash)

PALM BEACH (The Borowitz Report)—An ugly scene unfolded at Mar-a-Lago on Monday as an increasingly apoplectic Donald J. Trump watched the stock price of his newly listed Trump Media & Technology Group plummet.

Incensed b…