Melania Increases Tariffs on Canada to 10,000% to Retaliate for Katy Perry Dating Justin Trudeau
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a move that has further imperiled relations between the US and its northern neighbor, on Monday Melania Trump hiked tariffs on Canada to 10,000% in retaliation for Katy Perry dating Justin Trudeau.
Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney attempted to mollify the First Lady by stressing that his government had no jurisdiction over the love lives of his predecessor and the pop star.
But Mrs. Trump was unmoved, holding a White House press conference to blast the Trudeau-Perry romance.
“There are many bad things in world right now,” she said. “This be worst.”
Happy Monday, TBRers! And thanks to all of you who showed up to my live show in Princeton on Friday.
Oh my god! I snorted when I read "this be worst." Good thing I didn't have coffee in my mouth. 🤣 Thanks for a great start to my day.