WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—The US Navy struck a superyacht carrying Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas and his wife, Ginni, as it cruised off the coast of Venezuela, the Pentagon confirmed on Sunday.
As Navy divers searched for the Thomases, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth called the sinking of the 160-foot-long luxury vessel “an honest mistake.”
“When you’re going after narcoterrorists, every now and then you’re going to hit a Supreme Court justice,” he said.
At the White House, Donald Trump took a break from surveying demolition of the East Wing to comment on Thomas, stating, “He had a good run.”
Darn you Andy! I actually whooped for joy when I saw the headline. Such a disappointment when I saw your name - not that I’d want any harm to come to a Supreme Court justice.
We are in such a stupid timeline this could be true