Puppy Breaks Into Kristi Noem’s Official Residence and Craps on Rug

Bill Stephan on Unsplash

PIERRE, SOUTH DAKOTA (The Borowitz Report)—In an incident under investigation by state police, a puppy of indeterminate breed obtained access to Gov. Kristi Noem’s official residence Sunday night and excreted on the entryway carpet.

A police spokesman said that the act of canine vandalism is believed to be “political in nature.”

A…