The Borowitz Report

The Borowitz Report

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The Borowitz Report
Sharks Deny Any Interest in Eating Trump
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Sharks Deny Any Interest in Eating Trump

Jun 18, 2024
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The Borowitz Report
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Sharks Deny Any Interest in Eating Trump
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a close up of a shark in the water
Trust "Tru" Katsande on Unsplash

THE OCEAN DEEP (The Borowitz Report)—Calling his longstanding fear of being devoured by them “delusional thinking at its saddest,” the world’s sharks issued a statement on Tuesday disavowing “any interest whatsoever” in eating Donald J. Trump.

“Given his constant intake of Diet Coke and hamburgers, there is nothing to indi…

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