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The Borowitz Report

Trump Boasts About Crowd Size at His Medical Appointments

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Andy Borowitz
Jun 29, 2026
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John Carl D’Annibale /Albany Times Union via Getty Images

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Claiming that it “has to be some kind of record,” on Monday Donald J. Trump boasted about the “enormous” crowd size at his medical appointments.

“There were so many doctors at my last physical, there wasn’t room for them all,” he bragged. “They never turned out like…

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