I kind of felt he deserved the made up, extra cheesy, FIFA Peace Prize 🏆!!! It’s only too bad he’s too ignorant to understand the implications there! Did I say ignorant?! Sorry, meant to say stupid!!!
So out of undeserved deference for trump’s desires (and a desire to keep the Netherlands from being the first nation to be nuked by trump), as soon as he arrives in The Hague, trump is quickly presented with gold spray painted handcuffs that are clamped on his fast-bruising wrists.
Delighted at the sparkle and gleam, trump raises his hands triumphantly to show off his new bracelets. The crowds roar in approval. As he proudly stands there, arms raised, he asks for the pesky chain between the bracelets be removed.
“The antitheft device is still on these things,” he complains to PM Jetten. “That’s almost as tacky as not taking off the price tag!”
He said with tears in his eyes, no one has done what I have done ever or more bigly. I should be given the goldliest trophy to display behind my gold curtains. I picked out those curtains.
"They asked me to please come on my Qatari jumbo jet, which I'm happy to show off so they can admire it," he continued. "The invitation was partially redacted, but I was able to see through the black ink. It seems they're calling the plane 'Exhibit A' which I think is a cute name for it that they wanted to surprise me with on the trophy."
On Friday afternoon, Liberty University Law School emailed its first and second-year students about an “exciting opportunity to intern with the Department of Labor in DC.” One important caveat: only passionate devotees of President Trump would be considered. Students who “aligned politically with President Trump” and were “willing to work hard” were strongly encouraged to apply, even if they had poor grades.
Liberty University, founded by Jerry Falwell Sr., is a conservative Christian institution based in Lynchburg, Virginia. Falwell Jr., who took over the university after his father died in 2007, was an advisor to Trump.
Trump and his clown car, republicans and the 6 conservatives on the Supreme Court- they’re all trying to scare us about Sharia Law while trying to bring our country back to the 19th century in every way (except for slavery) in the name of Judeo-Christian values!
Lock Him Up Lock Him Up Lock Him Up. Personally I'd prefer a treason conviction at home for selling out America and enriching himself and his friends. That said, I'll take what I can get.
He's excited! But he wants to clear up that tertiary syphilis patch behind his ear first. When Barron was a baby, Melania rubbed caviar all over his dermo so he's going to try that. Then off he goes!
I’ve been saying that The Hague needs to give him and Bibi all the due recognition they so rightly deserve. Also got a notification that Andy’s book is to be delivered Monday. Stoked!
Thanks, thanks don’t know how I missed that, ordered. So pleased that you use Book Shop, but not surprised in the least. I support Lark & Owl Booksellers, in the heart of conservative Texas.
Yup. Idk why it’s taken me longer than usual. But it’s on the way. Also the cartoonist from the New Yorker had a book I sent to a friend who had knee replacement. That book was really good for laughs
A big burly guy like jesus weeping, I’m sure he remembered to call trump “sir” and tell him about his factory which under Biden was operating one hour a week. Needs a haircut, though. If junior had ever come home with jesus-hair, don would have beaten ivana black and blue
Finally, recognition he deserves!
And the very special prize must be accepted by Trump in person, right?
Greeted with golden handcuffs
Let’s just call them “golden jewelry” so as not to tip him off
I hear it will be presented in the Donald J. Trump - Hermann Göring ‘Never Forget’ Ballroom in The Hague - that should guarantee his attendance!
Love your comment. Very appropriate. You do realize Trump has no idea what you are talking about!
But Steven Miller does…
And Steve’s mad as hell about it: “Bastards stole the name I wanted for *our* ballroom!”
Jack Smith is very familiar with how the ICC works. 😉
I kind of felt he deserved the made up, extra cheesy, FIFA Peace Prize 🏆!!! It’s only too bad he’s too ignorant to understand the implications there! Did I say ignorant?! Sorry, meant to say stupid!!!
Anyway, thanks, Andy❣️
So out of undeserved deference for trump’s desires (and a desire to keep the Netherlands from being the first nation to be nuked by trump), as soon as he arrives in The Hague, trump is quickly presented with gold spray painted handcuffs that are clamped on his fast-bruising wrists.
Delighted at the sparkle and gleam, trump raises his hands triumphantly to show off his new bracelets. The crowds roar in approval. As he proudly stands there, arms raised, he asks for the pesky chain between the bracelets be removed.
“The antitheft device is still on these things,” he complains to PM Jetten. “That’s almost as tacky as not taking off the price tag!”
and hopefully gets!
Can Putin be invited as well?
An American, an Israeli and a KGB Agent meet in a prison...
And Bibi.
He’s had a standing invitation already.
Obama is invited to be one of the presenters.
He said with tears in his eyes, no one has done what I have done ever or more bigly. I should be given the goldliest trophy to display behind my gold curtains. I picked out those curtains.
"They asked me to please come on my Qatari jumbo jet, which I'm happy to show off so they can admire it," he continued. "The invitation was partially redacted, but I was able to see through the black ink. It seems they're calling the plane 'Exhibit A' which I think is a cute name for it that they wanted to surprise me with on the trophy."
Let me guess. Is it the inaugural King Leopold Lifetime Achievement Award?
I love this Clym.
Had to look up King Leopold, spot on!
Hopefully it’s a full metal jacket medal, sir.
He looks sickening.
On Friday afternoon, Liberty University Law School emailed its first and second-year students about an “exciting opportunity to intern with the Department of Labor in DC.” One important caveat: only passionate devotees of President Trump would be considered. Students who “aligned politically with President Trump” and were “willing to work hard” were strongly encouraged to apply, even if they had poor grades.
Liberty University, founded by Jerry Falwell Sr., is a conservative Christian institution based in Lynchburg, Virginia. Falwell Jr., who took over the university after his father died in 2007, was an advisor to Trump.
🤢🤮
You left out that he was cremated and buried in a matchbox as he was a con man and that full of it.
I wonder if Andy could embed himself and report secretly as our mole on the inside ?
And Jerry Falwell, Jr. had quite the scandalous tenure: https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/liberty-lawsuit-jerry-falwell-jr-sex-scandal-settlement-b2754818.html Of course, I guess he laughed all the way to the bank after LU paid him off. I also did not know about the Michael Cohen connection to Falwell, Jr.
Thank you for this link...I had completely forgotten and also did not know about Cohen's connection.
ugh...
Acolytes only
Trump and his clown car, republicans and the 6 conservatives on the Supreme Court- they’re all trying to scare us about Sharia Law while trying to bring our country back to the 19th century in every way (except for slavery) in the name of Judeo-Christian values!
talk to farm workers, for example, about the slavery part!
This sounds like something Andy would write😄
🤬 🤬 🤬
Lock Him Up Lock Him Up Lock Him Up. Personally I'd prefer a treason conviction at home for selling out America and enriching himself and his friends. That said, I'll take what I can get.
More winning!!
I hope he attends to accept his award.
This is the news we have been waiting for. Thank you, intrepid reporter.
So extremely well deserved!
He's excited! But he wants to clear up that tertiary syphilis patch behind his ear first. When Barron was a baby, Melania rubbed caviar all over his dermo so he's going to try that. Then off he goes!
I’ve been saying that The Hague needs to give him and Bibi all the due recognition they so rightly deserve. Also got a notification that Andy’s book is to be delivered Monday. Stoked!
A must read, it’s awesome.
Book?
https://bookshop.org/p/books/profiles-in-ignorance-how-america-s-politicians-got-dumb-and-dumber-andy-borowitz/a6fe4527cb334426?ean=9781668003893&next=t&next=t&affiliate=109008
Thanks, thanks don’t know how I missed that, ordered. So pleased that you use Book Shop, but not surprised in the least. I support Lark & Owl Booksellers, in the heart of conservative Texas.
Yup. Idk why it’s taken me longer than usual. But it’s on the way. Also the cartoonist from the New Yorker had a book I sent to a friend who had knee replacement. That book was really good for laughs
You know I always forget to choose a local bookstore. I hope they’ll choose for me. Next time I’ll be more careful.
Jesus weeps! Is this real or parody? With Trump, I can't tell anymore! 🤷🏻♂️
A big burly guy like jesus weeping, I’m sure he remembered to call trump “sir” and tell him about his factory which under Biden was operating one hour a week. Needs a haircut, though. If junior had ever come home with jesus-hair, don would have beaten ivana black and blue
It's that looking glass again.