Trump Honors Those Who Helped Others Avoid Service at Tomb of the Unknown Podiatrist
QUEENS, NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—In what has become a Veterans Day tradition for him, on Tuesday Donald J. Trump laid a wreath at the Tomb of the Unknown Podiatrist.
Trump made his annual pilgrimage to pay homage to the heroic doctors who issued bogus diagnoses to ensure that their privileged patients never answered the call of duty.
In an emotional tribute, Trump thanked the fallen foot specialists who bravely risked their medical licenses so that others facing military service could be free.
Choking back tears, he said, “They gave everything so people like me could give nothing.”
TBR Salutes an American Hero
This Veterans Day, let’s salute a true American hero, Capt. Dylan Blaha. He served our country in combat. Now he is serving us by standing up to Donald Trump, refusing to be deployed as a National Guard member against the American people. You can watch my full interview with Dylan here.
READ: How This Shitshow Ends
WASHINGTON—Visiting the White House on Monday, Syrian President Ahmed al-Sharaa said he was “utterly horrified by the scale of destruction” he found there.
“This place has been flattened, reduced to rubble,” he said. “It is like nothing I have ever seen.”
Al-Sharaa pledged that Syria would do “everything we can” to aid in the White House’s reconstruction, telling Donald Trump, “Mr. President, you must find who did this and bring them to justice.”
And the Fallen Arch de Trump