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The Borowitz Report

Trump's 200% Tariff on European Alcohol Causes Pete Hegseth to Angrily Resign

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Andy Borowitz
Mar 14, 2025
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WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump’s threatened 200 percent tariff on alcohol from the European Union has caused Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth to angrily resign, the Pentagon confirmed on Friday.

Speaking to reporters, Hegseth said that he considered the tariffs on “Irish whiskey, French Sancerre, and the exqui…

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