The Borowitz Report

The Borowitz Report

When Trump Named a Horse After Himself

TBR Sunday Read

Andy Borowitz's avatar
Andy Borowitz
Jan 18, 2026
∙ Paid
One of these is qualified to be commander-in-chief. (Anna Moneymaker via Getty Images / Julie Bishop on Unsplash)

Welcome to this Sunday edition of TBR! This week we unveil an amazing new anthem for Greenland, and unearth a humiliating story from Donald Trump’s failure-laden past.

Note: This story is 100% true, because it would be impossible for me to make up something this bizarre.

When Donald Trump recently slapped his name on the Kennedy Center and a proposed series of battleships, he shocked millions who couldn’t imagine a U.S. president marking his territory like an incontinent poodle.

But these christenings, as embarrassing as they were, shouldn’t have come as a surprise. Trump has never been able to resist putting his name on things. In fact, he once did it to a horse.

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