The Borowitz Report

The Borowitz Report

Who Trump Wants to Perform at the Super Bowl

TBR Sunday Read

Andy Borowitz's avatar
Andy Borowitz
Feb 08, 2026
∙ Paid
Rob Carr/Getty Images

Donald Trump’s objection to the headliner of tonight’s Super Bowl halftime show, Bad Bunny, has been well documented. He’s called the Grammy-winning global superstar a “terrible choice”—a remarkable assessment considering he also said that he “never heard of him.”

But Trump’s anger about Bad Bunny is more than just words. Behind the scenes, he has been engaged in an aggressive campaign to oust the Puerto Rican singer from the halftime show. That effort has been a tightly held secret—until now.

In a TBR exclusive, we have retrieved the following classified document from an open file box in a Mar-a-Lago bathroom. As you will see, it is a confidential memo to NFL commissioner Roger Goodell in which Trump proposes several replacements for Bad Bunny:

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