The Borowitz Report

The Borowitz Report

Worm Warns Senate He Has Eaten 90 Percent of RFK Jr.’s Brain

Jan 29, 2025
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WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In what some are calling the most alarming testimony ever heard in the United States Senate, on Wednesday a worm who feasted on Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.’s brain for over twenty years urged senators not to confirm the Health and Human Services nominee.

“I have eaten over 90 percent of Bobby Kennedy’s b…

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