233 Comments
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Seattle Mom's avatar

After the Reiner debacle, I’m more concerned about his moral decline than his mental one. Handlers can manage the stupidity. But the narcissistic personality disorder is much harder to rein in

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Andy Borowitz's avatar

The ship sailed on his moral decline long ago. He is, after all, an adjudicated rapist. That incident occurred three decades ago (and there are others).

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Seattle Mom's avatar

Too true. But he has still crossed a line as a sitting president who tries to pretend that the savage and tragic murder of a beloved person is somehow the victim’s fault

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Andy Borowitz's avatar

Remember, he did blame John McCain for being a POW. Trump avoided a similar fate by obtaining a podiatrist’s note.

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Seattle Mom's avatar

I excuse the president for nothing. I just think it’s about time we called it for what it is…a garden implement will always be a garden implement

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Louise Duncan's avatar

tool, to be exact

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BTAM Master's avatar

manure spreading device, to be exact

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Annette's avatar

and certainly not the sharpest

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

I'm still waiting for the gilded monument to the bone spur, as well as the Medal of Freedom being posthumously awarded to the podiatrist...

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Eileen Kaplan's avatar

Yes, there are so many examples of his despicable perceptions

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Elisabeth Birker's avatar

🤮.

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Seattle Mom's avatar

I read a really interesting article about FTD (FrontoTemporalDementia) positing that this is more likely Trump’s diagnosis than Alzheimer’s. I’m no neurologist , but have people with different types of dementia in my life. There really are types and markers, and it’s a question worth considering

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Linda McCaughey's avatar

I do not care what anyone calls it. He is unfit for office and dangerous to this country and the world. He has to go.

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Elisabeth Birker's avatar

👍🏻

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Beth Wieters's avatar

My father had FTD. The symptoms are there. The difference: my father was kind and loving and had no secondary diagnosis of narcissisism.

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Harvey Perry's avatar

Perhaps the frontal lobe of his brain is being devoured by a worm.

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

A worm that crawled out of Hegseth's tequila bottle, had appetizers in what's left of RFK,Jr's brain and then settled in the remains of Trump’s brain

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Joanne Rossmassler Fritz's avatar

I read that too. FrontoTemporal Dementia makes sense. Especially with the way he stands. Look for him to have even more trouble speaking, until he can’t speak at all.

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Octavia Redwood's avatar

praise the Lord!

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Susan Barnes's avatar

I pray for that every day.

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Wroe Clark's avatar

Yeah, if he would just shut up that would go a long way.

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Annette's avatar

Oh Happy Day!

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Mary Gilbert's avatar

There will be dancing in the street & champagne bottles popping.

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Paul Ehrenzeller's avatar

Trump’s comments about Rob Reiner are the latest example of his advancing dementia. He is losing any inhibition he had (which wasn’t much) and showing his real, true self.

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Jonathan Aborn's avatar

Vote, if we get the chance again…..

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Pradnya Sikand's avatar

I agree Andy ! Given Trump’s long history of mental and moral decline, Jake Tapper’s book will have to run to several weighty tomes 😉Perfect to fill the shelves of the Presidential library along with the Epstein files ! You nailed the last line . A perfect 10 😂😂

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misia.d's avatar

I just looked up that his proposed library is supposed to be a huge building in Miami. Maybe it will be just a bar & hotel since books only encourage reading & most of the documents have been flushed. Why Miami?

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Harvey Perry's avatar

Thanks to Trump blocking any action to address global heating, in the long run his library will be under water, just like his Presidency

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Margaret Miesnik's avatar

My exact thought!

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Annette's avatar

I actually envision his library in a bodega near Four Seasons Landscaping; the only book is "The Art of the Deal" with the $1.00 price stickers still on them from the Dollar Tree.

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Antoinette S. Hamilton's avatar

And maybe one of his Bibles. Don't forget those.

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

The Donald J. Trump driving range and putting green.

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Lady Emsworth's avatar

Not a brothel like his GrandPa's?

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

That's a worthy addition!

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

Might I humbly suggest that Jakey publish his tome in serialized form, ala the great Charles Dickens?

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Annette's avatar

love it - keep the madness alive

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Pradnya Sikand's avatar

Great idea ! On the understanding that nobody reads Jakey and his tomes gather dust while Dickens will always be great and beloved 😉

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Kent Cooper's avatar

The ship sailed almost the moment it left the harbor.

"The biography describes Dennis Burnham, a toddler at the time of Trump’s childhood days who lived right next door to the affluent family. Burnham’s mother briefly put her toddler, Dennis, in a playpen in their garden only to return just moments later to find a 5 or 6-year-old Donald Trump — the very same person who would go on to become the 45th US president — standing on his side of the fence that separated their years, violently throwing rocks at her toddler son."

https://polinews.org/even-as-a-child-donald-trump-was-a-sadistic-loudmouth-bully-who-threw-rocks-at-a-toddler-and-scared-the-neighbors-trump-biography/

His morality never declined. He's never had any.

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The Rickster's avatar

The Anti-President.

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Mark Lip's avatar

This has me wondering about his marriage proposal to Marla Maples.

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Gabriele C Overweg's avatar

I believe she was lucky to have escaped.

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Elisabeth Birker's avatar

🎯

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Erik Bruun's avatar

Moral decline? What decline? He's been a horrible immoral man since he was a boy raised in a racist, horrible family.

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Seattle Mom's avatar

Perhaps moral decline was the wrong phrase. But the lack of control over how he presents himself regarding tragedy, when he must be the center of the conversation and not the victim, this is a new low

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Erik Bruun's avatar

Trump's unique talent is to dig deeper and wider depths of the septic tank that he has pulled our nation into with such enthusiasm from so many people who should know better.

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Ginger's avatar

truth to that.... he was throwing rocks at a baby when he was only 5 yo.... what's interesting about what I just wrote is when I googled to get the age right AI said there was no confirmation that was true.... hmmmm.... AI hard at work to protect the monster?

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Erik Bruun's avatar

The "artificial" part of AI can be quite useful in undermining the "intelligence" part.

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jb from Weston's avatar

So you're saying "FI", for "Fake Intelligence", Erik???

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Erik Bruun's avatar

I don't know what the right word is. Intelligence is a human quality that simply cannot embrace all of its qualitative variables in computer codes, no matter how impressive or far-reaching.

So, yes, "fake" could cover it, but so could "delusional", "insane" and "misleading," and many other terms that overlook that intelligence is not simply the accumulation and synthesizing of data.

No "intelligent" person, for example, would have a child based on data. The data says they are expensive, exhausting and incredibly inconvenient. Data does not grasp meaning, love or joy.

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Lady Emsworth's avatar

"AI said there was no confirmation that was true.... hmmmm..."

You mean the baby didn't sign an affidavit?

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Kate Decker's avatar

how could anyone not LIKE the whole tribe of trump !! (excluding Mary Trump, who is an intelligent and principled outlier, and doing some good in the world).

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Carol Hatch's avatar

I actually think he has never had any moral compass. I think that at this point he has no restraint in showing his immorality.

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Holly Hajduk's avatar

Can his morality / humanity declined anymore??

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Kim D's avatar

There is no moral decline. His mental decline merely disables him now from pretending he's something he's never been. I think the OG New Yorkers always knew who he was.

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Lady Emsworth's avatar

Your morals CAN'T decline when you never had any in the first place. . .

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carol corsaro's avatar

Dumpf is the most cringeworthy person I’ve ever seen.

Unfortunately this administration has many similar persons. How did we come to this?!?

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Kent Cooper's avatar

Bive us a break, it's not possible to decline further when you start from the basement. :)

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Ellen Buss's avatar

They’re handling his stupidity?? Hard to believe it could be any worse!

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Wis's avatar

Moral *decline*? Under the dictionary definition of “Satan”, it says, “See Trump, Donald J.”

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Eileen Kaplan's avatar

There’s really no treatment for a personality disorder. But, I guess that is pretty obvious

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Kandy Brown's avatar

How can you decline to the pits if you are already there? I don't think that he CAN go lower!

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Valerie Dixon's avatar

Has he EVER had morals and decency?? Nah. A Malignant narcissist who cares only about himself.

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Denis Pombriant's avatar

The book is done but they’re waiting to find a happy ending.

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Kathleen D. Pierce's avatar

You mean like he's finally died and went to hell? 👹

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Diana's avatar

Oh, I think that's coming.

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Annette's avatar

from your font to God's ears

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Abigail Norling's avatar

Touchè

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Lady Emsworth's avatar

Depends on who the "Happy Ending" is designed to please. . .

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Diane Geitner's avatar

and waiting… I’m growing old

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Babydoc's avatar

Keep banging away at this, Andy: ie: Trump’s mental status (or lack of one), and while you’re at it, don’t forget our alcoholic secretary of defense and our heroin addicted alcoholic secretary of HHS. These stories describe ongoing risk to the US.

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Concerned Citizen's avatar

Along with the non-elected asses like Steven Miller and Russell Vought !

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Annette's avatar

and throw in real estate developers like Steve Witless and Slender Man

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Kimberly J.'s avatar

The Hegseth Haiku

Was the perfect thing to read

Right before breakfast!

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Liz Grady's avatar

Haha! I just made up my own little Haiku before seeing this

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Lawrence Gottlieb's avatar

Jake Tapper is CNN's Bari Weiss in sheep's clothing.

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Andy Borowitz's avatar

OUCH. If Paramount buys CNN, will they need both?

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Lawrence Gottlieb's avatar

Oi, I know!

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Kandy Brown's avatar

Jake WILL be fired, for sure. I hope he knows what he's done to himself!

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Lawrence Gottlieb's avatar

Back atcha, Andy

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Kathleen D. Pierce's avatar

Tapper? Everyone should be writing a book about Angry Dementia Don & his entire mediocre white guy goon squad (plus Susie & Karoline)! After the crap Captain Cankles spewed about Rob Reiner Monday, and THEN doubled down on his rant, why isn't he admitted to the Dementia Ward at the old folks home? WHY???

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Tirzah Mason's avatar

Would you want this guy in your ward?

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Empennage's avatar

egads, just the thought 🤢 🤮

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Pat Ebervein's avatar

A. Wis is wise! And a wisecracker, too - congrats, WIS! B. I love reading you, Andy, but I sometimes wonder how you manage to pull this off so hilariously and frequently - do you drink rocket fuel for breakfast?

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Wis's avatar

🙏 (I’m pretty surprised! There were *lots* of fabulous haiku-ists I share this honor with, IMO.)

Thank you!

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Wis's avatar

(I don’t share heggie’s breakfast fare in the haiku, I’ll say that)

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Judy L Chucker's avatar

Maybe it’s not a big enough breaking news story for Jake.

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Cindy Froggatt's avatar

Wis - the whiskey krispies rhyme was inspired!

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Andy Borowitz's avatar

Only Wis knows for sure, but is his use of the word battle an allusion to Kellogg’s home base in Battle Creek?

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Marianne Burbank's avatar

I assumed the word battle referred to the pops and crackles of the Krispies…

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Wis's avatar

(Y)

🙃

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Cindy Froggatt's avatar

Both subtle and sophisticated — I like your analysis, Andy!

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Wis's avatar

Sure, why not? 😉. (No, I’m not that clever.)

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Marilyn Jackson's avatar

Thanks for my morning laugh and congratulations to Wis. That is a great haiku.

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Wis's avatar

🙏

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Suzi Harkey's avatar

The last line got me! You are the master of the genre!

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Annette's avatar

the last line is the best . . . newbies to TBR need to be warned that they should not be drinking beverages until they've finished reading the post

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Brenda Reiss's avatar

Read Mary Trump's 2nd book. Trump has no morality to have it decline. This is who he is. Making fun of people with disabilities, attacking women, extorting money from anyone.

He is a black hole that swallows anyone in his way.

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Roland Saeger's avatar

I've analogized DJT as a black hole for a few years now. Those who allow themselves to get drawn into his orbit throw off heat for a while then disappear.

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Brenda Reiss's avatar

Some don't make it to prison

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Brenda Reiss's avatar

Do

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Linda Mitchell, KCMO's avatar

Andy, I await your take on Susie Wiles's bizarro interview that seems to have been designed to completely upend this entire maladministration. Do you think she's just sick of it all? I think she's demonic, but maybe working for Nixon in Hell . . . She is disavowing the VF interview but really????

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Andy Borowitz's avatar

Trump has just moved her office to the East Wing.

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Linda Mitchell, KCMO's avatar

🤣

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Wis's avatar

😅😅😅

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misia.d's avatar

I’ll have what she had, it seems to be cleansing.

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Wis's avatar

She has since said that VF took everything out of context and has backpedaled a LOT, as I understand it. (The WH wouldn’t continue to support her otherwise. IMO, anyway.)

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Anna Potempska's avatar

"My mental decline is the best, the fastest, not yet seen anywhere in the World"

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BTAM Master's avatar

Trump will blame his mental decline on Biden. But that means he'd be aware and admit it,so I'm not holding my breath.

Well deserved Wis!

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Wis's avatar

🙏

I love the idea that trump will blame Biden for his mental decline!! He will actually very likely DO that, if cornered!

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Cindy Froggatt's avatar

Jake is waiting until he scores a long interview with Susie Wiles. “Like Trump,” Tapper said recently, “Wiles mouth just runs and runs until the truth leaks out. Then I don’t have to do any investigating that’s supposed to be part of that investigative journalism I’ve heard about.”

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