Thank you Andy! Your headlines always make me snort with laughter, and then I have to read them out loud to my husband, who wants to know what in the world I'm laughing about....."Justa Dick Vance", indeed!
It sounds like the MAGAts have found their very own Horst Wessel; a young NAZI propagandist who was supposedly killed by two German Communists and was immediately proclaimed a martyr for the party by Joseph Goebbels, the NAZI Propaganda Minister, and Adolf Hitler.
You keep us sane and hopeful Andy. Thank you every day, for the gift of humor and hope that you share with us all. We love and respect you. You are a life raft in the sea of sadness.
Any thoughts on how to protect independent-media voices of reason and clarity as you/substack/etc. grow in importance and visibility to metastasizing evil-dom?
At least Dan Rather is still writing, on Substack, at 93. But of course he does not have the clout jhe did when there were only three national TV channels.
Are you saying Public media is now "mostly just have hate, ignorance and lies"? If that is what you're saying, I strongly disagree. Public media (and the Guardian) are some of our last holdouts...support them if you can!
I read "At least we HAD Public TV" giving me the impression it had been replaced. We still have Public TV, and now it's even more important to give it as much support as possible.
"Corporation for Public Broadcasting says it's shutting down"
"The Corporation for Public Broadcasting, the conduit for federal funds to NPR and PBS, announced on Friday that it is beginning to wind down its operations given President Trump has signed a law clawing back $1.1 billion in funding for public broadcasting through fiscal year 2027."
I worked in TV and met Dan Rather who actually introduced himself to me with a hearty handshake. I call my right hand the “Dan Hand” because I admired him for years after seeing him absolutely grill Nixon’s lyin’ butt at a press conference — unlike the “press puppets” who let Trump get away with outrageous falsehoods every day.
Amen, amen! Finding the Truth gets very complicated and messy when immature adults have the microphone. Walter Cronkite at least tried to present the truth.
You're correct. NEWS was not a profit center; it was a community service. Our economy is based on consumerism, shareholder dominance and cronyism. I'm glad I grew up with the likes of those you mention above. We know the difference and what we get today is merely entertainment and lots of commercials.
I remember when Walter Cronkite announced to the nation that John Kennedy had been assassinated. He had to take off his glasses and rub his eyes. He couldn’t speak. I will never forget that. It was truly memorable. We, as a nation, felt his pain.
Cripes, I remember Huntley/Brinkley AND Cronkite. Back when the news was a loss leader for a station and news was the only thing delivered by newsreaders and journalists. Now, news programs have segments of consumer goods, for crying out loud. I think that trying to sell crap on what was a news show is utterly obnoxious...and corrupt.
Our economy is based on consumerism, cronyism and shareholders' short-term quarterly profits. We the people could boycott/not purchase anything but the necessities and see how the corporatizing of America fares?
It's terrifying how quickly the " independent media" has capitulated. We all used to smugly declare, "it can't happen here". Well, in less than 9 months it has.
And I, for another, am glad you are not part of that Corporate Glob of GroupThink. Whatever would we dissenters do without your humor pull us through this morass of days?
Did I miss something? The second amendment leads to yet another person’s head being blown off to protect our right to bear arms. Ok. The first amendment leads to people losing jobs for speaking out to protect our right to… what is it again?
The appropriately named second amendment also leads to the second law of thermodynamics. Another in life's long list of answers to the question: Is this all a coincidence?
I saw flags at half mast at the Capitol and elsewhere yesterday. I asked my husband who died. I can’t believe this! Some how this has horrified me the most!!!
Yet when Speaker Melissa Hortman, her husband, and dog were all murdered in their home Trump couldn’t be bothered to call Gov Walz because he said Walz is “weird.” I believe he went golfing instead.
A house we pass on our way to the grocery store belongs to a trumpie who advertises. I was not at all surprised to see he had a flag at half mast yesterday.
He used Christian identity to negate Christ‘s teachings, and those of all the other major religions. What could be weirder than a Christian calling for public executions? Wasn’t that what the Romans did to Jesus?
I just barely check in on the news anymore and if something Trump, or Kirk, etc. comes on, I turn the TV off or switch to another non-news channel. It’s hideous that they’ve all become sycophants to the Melon Felon. Sigh. Getting ready to vote BLUE, all the way! Thanks for trying to keep our heads above the cesspool!
Kirk did not deserve to be murdered for expressing his opinions, as shitty as they were. But people should take a few minutes and read his quotes. He was full of hate for many of his fellow American citizens. And he made a ton of money off of that hate. That is who he was. And it ain’t disrespectful to point that out.
Thanks, as always, for supporting what I do.
you are a national treasure!
and thanks again for turning me on to Jesse Welles, OMG
https://youtu.be/wTmZu55ssF8?si=9VWb0qFE_yXz4pXD
Jesse Wells is phenomenal!!
Andy, you are an international treasure ❣️🙏
Thank YOU, Andy! ❤️
I second that Elaine!
Thank you for being here. I have trouble finding much humor these days, but you make me laugh.
Thanks for keeping us sane! Your blend of wisdom and humor is priceless.
And we appreciate what you do, Andy.
Right on! Andy!!
Thank you Andy! Your headlines always make me snort with laughter, and then I have to read them out loud to my husband, who wants to know what in the world I'm laughing about....."Justa Dick Vance", indeed!
...and doing 'Hitlery things' !!
😂😂 I laughed so hard at this. Brilliant Andy Borowitz ❣️
Exactly what I do!
And thank you …. For being you. It’s enough.
I don't dare to think where we would be without you!
It sounds like the MAGAts have found their very own Horst Wessel; a young NAZI propagandist who was supposedly killed by two German Communists and was immediately proclaimed a martyr for the party by Joseph Goebbels, the NAZI Propaganda Minister, and Adolf Hitler.
Thank you. I had forgotten the details. This present Kirk pageant is right out of the tyrant's playbook. Epstein who?
You keep us sane and hopeful Andy. Thank you every day, for the gift of humor and hope that you share with us all. We love and respect you. You are a life raft in the sea of sadness.
Any thoughts on how to protect independent-media voices of reason and clarity as you/substack/etc. grow in importance and visibility to metastasizing evil-dom?
Thank you for doing what you do to support us in our time of need! Humor, frankness and intelligence all wrapped up in one!
Thanks for DOING what you do!!
Thank YOU for being here ❤️
I rue the day when tv made news programs profit centers. Where are you now Walter Cronkite our nation turns its lonely eyes to you. Woo woo woo.
At least Dan Rather is still writing, on Substack, at 93. But of course he does not have the clout jhe did when there were only three national TV channels.
I remember, Woody.
When what you were able to see on TV was determined by which direction mountains were, and thus which transmissions you would receive.
Few had all three, but most had two...plus Public. (At least we had Public TV. Now we mostly just have hate, ignorance and lies...)
Are you saying Public media is now "mostly just have hate, ignorance and lies"? If that is what you're saying, I strongly disagree. Public media (and the Guardian) are some of our last holdouts...support them if you can!
Respectfully...
Please reread my comment.
Thank you.
I read "At least we HAD Public TV" giving me the impression it had been replaced. We still have Public TV, and now it's even more important to give it as much support as possible.
Apologies for the misinterpretation.
Sad times...
"Corporation for Public Broadcasting says it's shutting down"
"The Corporation for Public Broadcasting, the conduit for federal funds to NPR and PBS, announced on Friday that it is beginning to wind down its operations given President Trump has signed a law clawing back $1.1 billion in funding for public broadcasting through fiscal year 2027."
https://www.npr.org/2025/08/01/nx-s1-5489808/cpb-shut-down-public-broadcasting-trump
Thank you.
I worked in TV and met Dan Rather who actually introduced himself to me with a hearty handshake. I call my right hand the “Dan Hand” because I admired him for years after seeing him absolutely grill Nixon’s lyin’ butt at a press conference — unlike the “press puppets” who let Trump get away with outrageous falsehoods every day.
Amen, amen! Finding the Truth gets very complicated and messy when immature adults have the microphone. Walter Cronkite at least tried to present the truth.
It was much easier at a time when news was EXPECTED to lose money, so instead of clickbait, they presented facts.
John Chancellor, Walter Cronkite, Huntley and Brinkley, Jim Lehrer...
Names that now mean tragically little, but did so much to help America through Vietnam and Watergate, and a violently segregated south.
You're correct. NEWS was not a profit center; it was a community service. Our economy is based on consumerism, shareholder dominance and cronyism. I'm glad I grew up with the likes of those you mention above. We know the difference and what we get today is merely entertainment and lots of commercials.
Let's not forget Tim Russert.
Yes, Jeanne!
Also Robert MacNeil, The other half of the PBS MacNeil-Lehrer Report.
I remember when Walter Cronkite announced to the nation that John Kennedy had been assassinated. He had to take off his glasses and rub his eyes. He couldn’t speak. I will never forget that. It was truly memorable. We, as a nation, felt his pain.
Cripes, I remember Huntley/Brinkley AND Cronkite. Back when the news was a loss leader for a station and news was the only thing delivered by newsreaders and journalists. Now, news programs have segments of consumer goods, for crying out loud. I think that trying to sell crap on what was a news show is utterly obnoxious...and corrupt.
Our economy is based on consumerism, cronyism and shareholders' short-term quarterly profits. We the people could boycott/not purchase anything but the necessities and see how the corporatizing of America fares?
Carole -- CONTINUING AS S&G
What's that you say Andy Borowitz,
Cronkite, Chancellor, Jennings, Reasoner, Huntley and Brinkley have left -- and Steve Colbert's
Gone in May,
Gone in May.
I think Tom Brokaw deserves a mention too.
Betsy -- Brokaw And many others who were workmanlike, honest, ethical and not intimidated by the powers that be.
But Dan Rather is still active. You can subscribe to him.
they'd rather listen to Charlie Kirk spew lies and hatred
It's entertaining...just like video games, true crime and Walking Dead. NEWS IS NOT ENTERTAINMENT. IT'S A COMMUNITY SERVICE IN A DEMOCRACY.
Thanks! I just subscribed to his feed.
Let us add newspapers to the category of profit centers. US culture has been profoundly altered by this change.
Kay -- you can add the replacement of newspapers by rumor-laden unverified posts on "social media" to the list.
Yes! Woo, woo, woo!
It's terrifying how quickly the " independent media" has capitulated. We all used to smugly declare, "it can't happen here". Well, in less than 9 months it has.
Corporate media haven't been independent for awhile. They're just showing their true colors now.
When I realized a while back that corporate media are all huge companies that benefit from the massive tax cuts, I stopped watching.
Guess you could say they’re all lining up like good little Quislings to save their own asses!
True Colors Andy -- Red, pink and shivering purple?
I don’t know about the rest of you guys, but frankly, I’m scared.
“Pee Wee German!” I love it. I always call him Obergrupenfuror Miller.
Jeff Tiedrich, who is hilarious, calls him Nosferatu McGoebbels. There’s a strong resemblance in both cases.
When I see Miller, I see Goebbels: both in resemblance and dogma.
Yes I love that one. I don't use the PeeWee moniker, clever as it is, because Paul Ruebens doesn't deserve that association.
Justa. Dick. Vance is very apt, too!
That was a democratically arrived at appellation right here on TBR :-)
I call him Satan Miller.
Great! Short and on point. (Nothing about him is sweet.)
yes, and it avoids having to remember whether he spells it Steven or Stephen!
Furor-Fuhrer?
It is said that his horns are retractable
And I, for another, am glad you are not part of that Corporate Glob of GroupThink. Whatever would we dissenters do without your humor pull us through this morass of days?
I've always sucked at joining.
Did I miss something? The second amendment leads to yet another person’s head being blown off to protect our right to bear arms. Ok. The first amendment leads to people losing jobs for speaking out to protect our right to… what is it again?
Guns are good - speech is not good - sounds like 1984 to me.
Guess guns don’t kill. Words do
The appropriately named second amendment also leads to the second law of thermodynamics. Another in life's long list of answers to the question: Is this all a coincidence?
Yeah, me too.
You wouldn't be happy anyways. Marching in a straight line? Gimme a break.
Same here! Torture!
Andy, this one, new to me, may help.
https://share.google/VQhReh2tZWlaKdaje
Unrelated spam. Reported.
I saw flags at half mast at the Capitol and elsewhere yesterday. I asked my husband who died. I can’t believe this! Some how this has horrified me the most!!!
...especially considering the bloated yam didn't do this for the assassinations of Melissa and Mark Hortman by a right-wing extremist.
I want them half mast for Robert Redford!
His response was that he didn't know who they were! His staff doesn't share info with him?
he doesn't pay attention to anything but himself
Yet when Speaker Melissa Hortman, her husband, and dog were all murdered in their home Trump couldn’t be bothered to call Gov Walz because he said Walz is “weird.” I believe he went golfing instead.
he even missed a vigil for Kirk because he was at one of his golf courses . . . priorities, you know!
I had the same response. Couldn’t believe it.
A house we pass on our way to the grocery store belongs to a trumpie who advertises. I was not at all surprised to see he had a flag at half mast yesterday.
AND at McDonalds !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (never eat there anyway)
He used Christian identity to negate Christ‘s teachings, and those of all the other major religions. What could be weirder than a Christian calling for public executions? Wasn’t that what the Romans did to Jesus?
Absolutely- once again under the guise of being a Christian you can get away with anything. Using Christianity to promote hateful ideas-- sickening.
Calling Kirk good when he is bad is very 1984. I choose not to participate.
Keep up the good work, Andy! It makes me sick to see how much of Kirk's "work" has been normalized and glorified on mainstream media.
I just barely check in on the news anymore and if something Trump, or Kirk, etc. comes on, I turn the TV off or switch to another non-news channel. It’s hideous that they’ve all become sycophants to the Melon Felon. Sigh. Getting ready to vote BLUE, all the way! Thanks for trying to keep our heads above the cesspool!
Kirk did not deserve to be murdered for expressing his opinions, as shitty as they were. But people should take a few minutes and read his quotes. He was full of hate for many of his fellow American citizens. And he made a ton of money off of that hate. That is who he was. And it ain’t disrespectful to point that out.
Mike: Yes! Beautifully said!
Exactly how I feel - we don’t get no respect from MAGA toadies….
Stephen Miller aka Pee-Wee German. Just perfect! Sharing and I hope this goes viral. Thank you, Andy.
YES. He was a tireless advocate for horrific ideas.
And we thank you for it.
We are also extremely glad you do not work for the craven corporate media! Thank you, Andy!
Amen! And many thanks for all that you do.