Hello Andy! 😂I couldn’t care less about Hegseth and his battles with estrogen and mascara but my serotonin levels have spiked , reading your mischievous and hilarious post this morning! Thanks for making my day ! 😂❤️
Pete has also perfected the primal scream (note the bulging neck veins poorly covered up by the cheap makeup provided by his mentor, also loved by his AAG appointee). No, I won’t take it to the threesome image level as Scott may become really jealous.
I earned another snort award with this one; laughed so loud my husband came running. If you want another good laugh (but also some good info on testosterone) listen to This American Life's recent podcast "Testosterone"
To be a drag queen first requires you to have enough of a sense of humor to pick out a good drag name. Some goodies I've seen over the years: "Flotilla DaBarge" (a big-boned girl), "Tulita Pepsi" "Varla Jean Merman" (the love-child of Ethel Merman and Ernest Borgnine), "Virginia Hamm" and my favorite -- a computer expert and mathematician I once knew -- "Lois Carmen Denominator."
Screaming, weeny-testiculated, super-estrogenated Petey ain't no drag queen.
Thank you, Andy. I just woke up and I'm reading this through blurry eyes. My daughter died 2 weeks ago and I think this is the first time I laughed out loud in those two weeks. You have no idea the lives you reach with your humor.
Pistol Pete burst out with a shower of tears when he got the news, in his taxpayer funded $40,000 make up studio. He is applying for a FEMA grant to repair flood damage.
He should just get pregnant…That ought to calm him down and help him realize his true purpose in life…Just make sure you have plenty of saltines around, Petey!
As usual, Andy, very funny (and true), but the tests didn't go far enough. They would have also found that Heddy hegspeth was missing testicles, a brain, a backbone, and a heart. His/her make-up is really covering up a giant one-cell cyclospora, which explains the explosive diarrhea that comes out whenever he opens his/her mouth. That also explains why he survives in symbiotic relationship with the parasites pee-wee german miller and blob bannon and all the disease-carrying ticks that hang onto lying felon benedicttrump!
And Trump just might order the rest of the Cabinet Secretaries to get testosterone shots because, lately, they have not been as neck-vein-bulging threatening and intimidating as he would like them to be. But Stephen Miller will be exempt because he's just naturally Nazi-istic.
Fox knew what they were doing when they only let this guy out on weekends.
Hello Andy! 😂I couldn’t care less about Hegseth and his battles with estrogen and mascara but my serotonin levels have spiked , reading your mischievous and hilarious post this morning! Thanks for making my day ! 😂❤️
Pete has also perfected the primal scream (note the bulging neck veins poorly covered up by the cheap makeup provided by his mentor, also loved by his AAG appointee). No, I won’t take it to the threesome image level as Scott may become really jealous.
I earned another snort award with this one; laughed so loud my husband came running. If you want another good laugh (but also some good info on testosterone) listen to This American Life's recent podcast "Testosterone"
😂😂😂😂😂 I have a pillow over my mouth to muffle my howls of laughter. We always knew he was a pu$$y. Now we have the proof. Oh, my sides. 😂
As that weekend guy remember when the skateboard popped up and smacked him in the crotch ? Comes back to bite cha.... looking forward to more karma
He probably had a headache over the working week.
I just woke up. I so want this guy to have a bad period.
With migraine!
Take away the OTC meds by his bedside then.
😄 🤣 😂
According to several scientific studies, monkeys with smaller testicles will scream louder to compensate.
To be a drag queen first requires you to have enough of a sense of humor to pick out a good drag name. Some goodies I've seen over the years: "Flotilla DaBarge" (a big-boned girl), "Tulita Pepsi" "Varla Jean Merman" (the love-child of Ethel Merman and Ernest Borgnine), "Virginia Hamm" and my favorite -- a computer expert and mathematician I once knew -- "Lois Carmen Denominator."
Screaming, weeny-testiculated, super-estrogenated Petey ain't no drag queen.
damn... you win
I did not know that. Kinda wish I didn’t now.
Nah. If Hegseth were in the top 99th percentile of women for estrogen, that would make him smart, practical, and empathetic.
I'm not buying it.
Thank you, Andy. I just woke up and I'm reading this through blurry eyes. My daughter died 2 weeks ago and I think this is the first time I laughed out loud in those two weeks. You have no idea the lives you reach with your humor.
I’m so sorry to hear such sad news. ❤️
Please accept my sincere condolences.
My sincerest condolences 🙏🏻
I’m so sorry for your loss. ❤️🩹
So sorry for your loss. A bit of humor always lightens the load. Be well🙏💫
I'm very sorry for your loss.
😥🙏 My heart goes out to you.
I’m so sorry. Losing a child at any age, from newborn to adult, is a devastating experience
So sorry for your loss--the sadness comes and goes, and a bit of laughter helps between the tears.
Hogsbreath reportedly screamed “ This is Biden’s fault!”
In a really high voice.
😂😂
Absolutely!
But what about Hillary? Piggy Hogsbreath could think it's a feminist conspriacy.
Pistol Pete burst out with a shower of tears when he got the news, in his taxpayer funded $40,000 make up studio. He is applying for a FEMA grant to repair flood damage.
He should just get pregnant…That ought to calm him down and help him realize his true purpose in life…Just make sure you have plenty of saltines around, Petey!
While I wouldn’t wish any more children on this guy, going through a breech birth with no drugs would be a true test of “manliness” for this bully.
Agreed!
Oh! And Petey, you will have to resist the call of the bottle…Ate you manly enough to handle pregnancy, Boy?
Hope he has some Nampons when his nose starts bleeding.
omg, andy. every paragraph is perfect today!
As usual, Andy, very funny (and true), but the tests didn't go far enough. They would have also found that Heddy hegspeth was missing testicles, a brain, a backbone, and a heart. His/her make-up is really covering up a giant one-cell cyclospora, which explains the explosive diarrhea that comes out whenever he opens his/her mouth. That also explains why he survives in symbiotic relationship with the parasites pee-wee german miller and blob bannon and all the disease-carrying ticks that hang onto lying felon benedicttrump!
He scored testosterwrong.
As long as his man boobs don’t get in the way of his nurturing empathy and gentleness, he should be fine.
His man boobs coach is Kristi Noem's husband.
Thank you, Andy! What a great headline to wake up to! Now I am totally woke
5:06 am Colorado
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Great way to start the day!!!!!
That makes me happy!
Well….. then…. That too makes ME happy that I helped you be happy!
We need “happy” so much☺️
And Trump just might order the rest of the Cabinet Secretaries to get testosterone shots because, lately, they have not been as neck-vein-bulging threatening and intimidating as he would like them to be. But Stephen Miller will be exempt because he's just naturally Nazi-istic.
perhaps that's why the donOld asked Hogsbreath for a private meeting with him at Macy's in a changing room.
And he LIKED IT. He really, really liked it! 🤣