The Borowitz Report

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The Borowitz Report
The Borowitz Report
JD Vance to Serve Rest of Ghislaine Maxwell’s Prison Term

JD Vance to Serve Rest of Ghislaine Maxwell’s Prison Term

Jul 28, 2025
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The Borowitz Report
The Borowitz Report
JD Vance to Serve Rest of Ghislaine Maxwell’s Prison Term
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Anna Moneymaker/Getty Images

EDINBURGH, SCOTLAND (The Borowitz Report)—Donald J. Trump revealed on Monday that JD Vance has agreed to serve the remainder of Ghislaine Maxwell’s prison sentence for her.

“JD wasn’t thrilled about it, quite frankly,” Trump told reporters. “He was crying like a dog.”

“I told him to be a man,” he said. “It’s only 20 years.”

As …

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