I did look up how to nominate Andy for a Nobel a year or so ago. Reporting news stories is a fairly new category. The winner from that year had covered tenant issues in a NYC apartment building. That was lame enough to make me back off! We need something better than Nobel.
Susan, your sentence would be just as correct without the last four words. And the phrase "sense of humor" could be substituted with "soul" "heart" "empathy" etc.
Or, Charles Hall, at least as an easily available mental health aid for those who find that they need a bit of extra help to get through this nightmare.
I mean, if our Fed government is going to behave like they're all high, the rest of us should be able to access the same escape from the ugly reality that they're creating.
I love the expressions (Left = Shocked, Middle = Don't Make Waves, Right = Oblivious) on the faces of the three stooges standing behind Trump! Priceless.
The idea that anything damaged the presidency more than Trump and his stupid staff picks is laughable. E Jean Carroll was long before he was president. He fucked him self long ago. Wonder if Bezos is inviting Trump to his wedding?
My favorite voidoid is now Karoline Spokesbarbie. I wasn't even aware of her Ph.D. in nuclear physics from Trump U until today when she confused "bomber" with "fighter" pilot, announcing that she knew better than experts what actually happened at Fordor. She raged at the "low-level loser" who leaked the truth, prompting me to wonder if she was just stealing a glance at her make-up mirror when she said that.
They must have scoured every bowling alley in the country to find her is all I can say.
KaroLIE Leavitt-alone ~ the best a man can get. Trained by the likes of Sarah F***abee Sanders, KayLIE McEnany and the queen of alternative facts, Kellyanne Con-em-any-way.
Somewhere a hurricane is expected. Maybe Mexico so Ms. Sanchez can use her Spanish & give bilingual news coverage of the dreadful weather. Shelter in place & STAY THERE, please.
The organizer's of the NATO meeting purposefully pared down the meeting to two hours so the agenda is streamlined and focused. They did that specifically so that iddle Twumpie wouldn't get bored and stomp out, like the spoiled child he is. The U.S. is shamed and humiliated by this barbarian manbaby that the MAGAs elected.
Are you a distant relative of Mikhail Botvinnik, famous Russian chess grand master and three-time world champion? Different spelling, I know, but with a different alphabet, the last name could be rendered in different ways in English.
I haven't seen a John Wayne silly walk like that since Robin Williams tried to give lessons to Nathan Lane on 'walking like a real man' in The Birdcage ("howdy, ma'am...")
So good! This has been the best day ever in so many ways! Well, at least since Jan. 20. Thanks, Andy! I heard that quote on the news and my jaw dropped, though it is so in keeping with his consistent presidential demeanor (emphasis on mean).
The media is focusing on that instead of the fact that there was no prior communication w I th Netanyahu previous to the Israeli air strick. That is the real issue here.
Weird article on Bezos, talked about a prenup with this wife “learned his lesson” with wife #1 and had to share profits with her. As if she had nothing to do with him being able to start Amazon and worked at his side to make the dream happen. Then get dumped with the world watching.
As Dear Abby said many years ago, the problem with marrying a man who cheated on his wife with you, is you are marrying a man who cheats on his wife.
Incredible how the Prezzident uses the word "fuck" in public -- the first time ever in U.S. history -- is reported on CNN simply, "As the President is frustrated." Can you imagine how the press would go absolutely INSANE with joy reporting Obama for saying such a thing?!!! (especially if he said it while wearing a tan suit)
Any reasonably sane person would not be shocked by anything strumpet (is that word only feminine?) had to say. Just imagine how startling it would be if he showed any finesse, any wisdom or insight, anything remotely resembling a diplomat or role model, or a world class politician.
Sometimes nothing is funnier than reality. Enjoy!
I nominate Andy Borowitz for The Nobel Peace Prize (check my spelling - I’m laughing so hard it’s hard to type)
Ignoble Prize is available.
So is the Ignorant Prize, but you have to be smart enough to refuse it.
--and many are not!
Hear that Trump PR machine? Fax that committee now!
I did look up how to nominate Andy for a Nobel a year or so ago. Reporting news stories is a fairly new category. The winner from that year had covered tenant issues in a NYC apartment building. That was lame enough to make me back off! We need something better than Nobel.
Nothing against Nobels mind you.
The People's Choice Award for Instilling Sanity with Humor Award. PCAISHA rolls off the tongue
Perfect!
Was this building formerly owned by Fred Drumpf?
How ironic would that be??
His chances of winning the Nobel Peace Prize have truly been obliterated. Fuckin’ yeah!!!!
<golf clap>
Certainly, nothing is stranger than reality.
The MAGAs should try reality some time - it really is trippy.
Sadly, I don't think they have a sense of humor that would appreciate reality.
Susan, your sentence would be just as correct without the last four words. And the phrase "sense of humor" could be substituted with "soul" "heart" "empathy" etc.
Interesting. I agree with you. I think if MAGAts had a sense of humor they wouldn't like 47.
Shrooms
Holly Hajduk - For sure. The longer he stays in the Oval Office, the more we all need shrooms to cope.
--while the Trump administration is on God-knows-what every day!
The USDA really should approve psilocybin as a food additive.
-liked baked into Oreos like cocoa and folic acid!
Or, Charles Hall, at least as an easily available mental health aid for those who find that they need a bit of extra help to get through this nightmare.
I mean, if our Fed government is going to behave like they're all high, the rest of us should be able to access the same escape from the ugly reality that they're creating.
Cannabis is used in mental health treatments.
So much better than an Axios rundown. The truth truly is stranger than fiction.
That’s the most concise statement about trump et al ever! Thanks again Andy!
As the saying goes: you can’t make this shit up. 💩
I love the expressions (Left = Shocked, Middle = Don't Make Waves, Right = Oblivious) on the faces of the three stooges standing behind Trump! Priceless.
lol
TAN DUMP LORD
Spraytan Hitler
thank you for the snort!
Thank you Andy!!!! I laugh instead of cry.
--or sadder at the same time!
the Bezos unwelcome wagon is the best!
is Trump attending? asking for Iran...
Isnt it wonderful when the need for satire is obviated by the mockery they make of themselves.????
It’s obliterated!
Good one 😂, Susan!
Obviously.
Do they know how funny they are?
I think a lot of people cut him slack because they do feel so superior to him like the full on nazis Steven Miller and that Vought person.
I looked up “obliterated” in the dictionary, and Pete Hegseth’s picture was next to it. Good catch, Mr. B.
I've always thought of him as constantly oblitzerated...
Hey! You just coined a new word: oblitzerated. It means obliterated on steroids.
Thanks. I'll add it to my lexicon.
Blitz the beer that made Portland famous.
No Schlitz, Sherlock!
Laughed so hard I spilled the wine.
Al, can you recommend one that goes well with my wheaties...vs cheerios?
#Kegseth
You have tapped into the sauce Megan.
I tried HegsMeth but it never caught on.
Kegseth is inspired.
Drinks are on him.
Literally! Poured over the top of him. The drinks are ON him ‼️ LOL
More are in him!
I've heard his picture also appears next to the definitions for "unsecure" and "insecure."
And on bottles of Jack Daniels.
No, that would hurt sales too much!
<golf clap>
Was Hegseth's picture a pop-up diorama?
The idea that anything damaged the presidency more than Trump and his stupid staff picks is laughable. E Jean Carroll was long before he was president. He fucked him self long ago. Wonder if Bezos is inviting Trump to his wedding?
My favorite voidoid is now Karoline Spokesbarbie. I wasn't even aware of her Ph.D. in nuclear physics from Trump U until today when she confused "bomber" with "fighter" pilot, announcing that she knew better than experts what actually happened at Fordor. She raged at the "low-level loser" who leaked the truth, prompting me to wonder if she was just stealing a glance at her make-up mirror when she said that.
They must have scoured every bowling alley in the country to find her is all I can say.
She's Karo-lyin' to everyone!
Chestnuts roasting on an open pyre.
"I see and I hear and I speak no evil.
I carry no malice within my breast.
But quite without wishing a man to the devil
One may be permitted to hope for the best."
Piet Hein [one of his many "Grooks"...but you, Al, already knew that...]
I grock grooks ala Heinlein and Piet.
--or only Trump and Co.'s feet to the fire!
😜😜😜
I call her Bobblehead Barbie.
American maid
Must have Big Balls, the one still left from Doge.
PhD in Nuclear Physics from Trump U 😂😂😂😂 Do you think she got extra credits from her on the job training?.
Troll a $20 bill through a trailer park and you'd be a surprised what you come up with. Or maybe you wouldn't
KaroLIE Leavitt-alone ~ the best a man can get. Trained by the likes of Sarah F***abee Sanders, KayLIE McEnany and the queen of alternative facts, Kellyanne Con-em-any-way.
Aren’t they the tops?
No, shavings off the bottom of the barrel!
Kellyanne-the ultimate fake blonde, the ultimate fake!
Women in bowling allies have way more character.
...and accuracy, An.
--and every third-rate modeling agency!
I heard Bezos had relocated to a private island somewhere in the Caribbean. Cuba I think or maybe it was Haiti I don’t remember which.
You mean one of the 'shithole' countries?
I wonder if they were able to get at least a partial refund from the reception venue 🤔
Somewhere a hurricane is expected. Maybe Mexico so Ms. Sanchez can use her Spanish & give bilingual news coverage of the dreadful weather. Shelter in place & STAY THERE, please.
If they’re going to be in Caribbean, I wonder if she will go overboard to test out if her siliconed breasts and her Botox’ed lips keep her buoyant.
👏👏👏
She was pretty before she disfigured herself. smh
Why do people think that looks better than a few lines? She looks absolutely plastic between her face and boobs…
"Lifeboat Lauren".
I should be ashamed of saying that, but I am really, really not. How spiritually
unevolved of me!
I want him to invite Elon Musk. And have the whole damn thing on MARS. Oh, and a big explosion ;-)
I did read that the current president’s eldest daughter and her husband may be attending Bezos’ wedding.
I understand Jared and Ivanka were invited. Dump himself is at the NATO meeting trying to screw that up.
The organizer's of the NATO meeting purposefully pared down the meeting to two hours so the agenda is streamlined and focused. They did that specifically so that iddle Twumpie wouldn't get bored and stomp out, like the spoiled child he is. The U.S. is shamed and humiliated by this barbarian manbaby that the MAGAs elected.
Does he really have to try? Seems like it just kinda comes naturally to him
and a fine job he's doing there! They're probably hoping he leaves early.
Scary thought, he might show up.
I hope he wasn't invited and shows up. On the other hand, maybe they'll move the wedding and not tell him. 😉
Invited or not, he will show up.
Please see my Comment about the nuptials being relocated to Mary’s Lego.
FACT: Trump is known for crashing weddings held there.
He is not at risk if he crashes a Bris [the unkindest cut of all]; there is no end to that
schmuck. [Sadly, not original with me.]
Nothing like inviting "The Cooler". (With apologies to William Macy).
If only they would all fall into the polluted Venice canals! But since the wedding
is being moved to who knows where, that fantasy has gone fffft!
🎶 “It’s all happening at the zoo…”
😂😂😂
Jaysus, you cannot make this sh*t up. Holy guacamole! 45 and 47 are the Despicable Me of America. Please 86 47 ASAP
Put that in shells on the sand and the FBI will come to your door!😏
He’s actually more like Vector. Gru was revealed to have a good, tender side.
10-4
great minds, Al; yours is just quicker than mine!
It's Al:-)
10-4!
Bill Barr used the S word, Shit and not Trump used the F word Fuck! Those are not great roll models for our children!
A “roll model” rather than “a role model” would be something fashioned after a Kaiser - which come to think of it, is what Trump is acting like.
A troll model.
He THINKS he’s “Roll” model.
E. Jean would say otherwise, and so would Stormy Daniels.
he thinks he's a great negotiator; Monty Hall would beg to differ.
Monty Hall--love it!
Trump should disappear behind door number three!
That’s funny.
Wouldn’t Hermann Göring be more of a roll model? As in a jelly roll.
Berliner
Ja! Herr Drumpf ist ein Berliner
das stimmt, Greg...und nicht wie JFK.
Ich verstehe aber ich kann nicht Deutch sprechen. Nur Französisch, Spanisch und Englisch.
The NY Times declined to quote Trump's F-bomb, describing it only as an expletive. But then I'm guessing Fox News didn't report it either.
But it was all over MSNBC and Facebook.
and CNN... and each time the clip was on, I was glued to the TV. Love how tRump brings the trailer park aesthetic to the nation.
More like the Mob aesthetic rather than trailer park.
Faux News probably celebrated Dump's dirty language - sign of a top rate bully.
Fox could not report the news honestly and completely about Trump and his actions if their license depended upon it. A bad station to learn news from.
Like they're so highbrow? Two steps above the NYPost.
that much?
Their "F word" is already an abomination.
Corporate media is like that.
Choice of language is the least of reasons why Trump et al are not great role models.
Trumpolini's usage of Shit predates Barr's. Remember those "Shit hole countries"?
That's right as I forgot about that!
Are you a distant relative of Mikhail Botvinnik, famous Russian chess grand master and three-time world champion? Different spelling, I know, but with a different alphabet, the last name could be rendered in different ways in English.
Not that I am aware of a distant relative. I’ve heard of him!
"Hegseth after happy hour" 😂
I haven't seen a John Wayne silly walk like that since Robin Williams tried to give lessons to Nathan Lane on 'walking like a real man' in The Birdcage ("howdy, ma'am...")
And why does he persist in blowing his nose on the flag?
Beats me...
I think a drink should be named after him: "Pete's Obliteration Cocktail"
with a Signal twist!
or "The Bunker Bomb"!
Like a drunken blitzkreig of schadenfreude!
😂😂😂
So good! This has been the best day ever in so many ways! Well, at least since Jan. 20. Thanks, Andy! I heard that quote on the news and my jaw dropped, though it is so in keeping with his consistent presidential demeanor (emphasis on mean).
Wonderful and spot on!
Wonderful news, I was watching TV when he dropped the F bomb and was really shocked that anyone would thing what a great example for a President.
The media is focusing on that instead of the fact that there was no prior communication w I th Netanyahu previous to the Israeli air strick. That is the real issue here.
Oy....so many issues the media isn't focusing on
Wonderful laughs! Thanks! Especially like the tiny throwaway comment after the last item. :-)
You are on a ROLL. Awesome. Hegseth, obliterated!
Weird article on Bezos, talked about a prenup with this wife “learned his lesson” with wife #1 and had to share profits with her. As if she had nothing to do with him being able to start Amazon and worked at his side to make the dream happen. Then get dumped with the world watching.
As Dear Abby said many years ago, the problem with marrying a man who cheated on his wife with you, is you are marrying a man who cheats on his wife.
As I have said before: he who cheats...will continue to cheat. And that goes times ten for entitled jackasses like Bezos.
a man who marries his mistress, leaves a vacancy
Yeah, especially in his brain!
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Incredible how the Prezzident uses the word "fuck" in public -- the first time ever in U.S. history -- is reported on CNN simply, "As the President is frustrated." Can you imagine how the press would go absolutely INSANE with joy reporting Obama for saying such a thing?!!! (especially if he said it while wearing a tan suit)
Any reasonably sane person would not be shocked by anything strumpet (is that word only feminine?) had to say. Just imagine how startling it would be if he showed any finesse, any wisdom or insight, anything remotely resembling a diplomat or role model, or a world class politician.
Oh, how I LONG for finesse, wisdom, insight -- a Mark Carney, in other words.
<golf clap> excellent point!
As always, brilliant! Thank you! 🤗