Her family didn't live in the district when she was first elected. She probably never wanted to either. Her parents had a seasonal home. She has always lied to advance her career.
Well, her son probably does want her to spend more time with him - he’s still too young to understand her crazy politics. Who knows about her gun-toting husband? But you raise a good point, Andy. We need an apolitical way for family members to assert their views on how much time they want to spend with these resigning politicians!
Presenting: ACME Rent-a-Family! Choose your variety: Calm, Clueless, or Comatose. Includes the ACME Essentials Cute Child. Optional add-ons: the ACME Family Dog, the ACME Family Cat, and the ACME Family Bird ("beep, beep!"). For the holidays, ACME has marked down their Pictures 'n' Portraits Package: instant ancestry to hang on your walls for those so important photo ops. Get yours today! (ACME: the last word in reliable products!)
Presenting: the ACME Animated Lawyer Doll. Defends the rest of your dolls and figures, including Elf on the Shelf who has been accused of defamation. Actual legal knowledge not included.
Yeah. I'm sure. The holidays should be Merry and Bright at her house since she can just plug her brain into one of the sockets for the tree and light up the whole house.
I see every maga-loving mother or father being responsible for years of future therapy needed by their children to re-hinge to reality and a sane way of life.
You’re in top form! “Extinction level event known as DT”, “original recipe and extra crazy”, “septic tank of lies”! Hope Stefanik enjoys reading this masterpiece!
"Moderate Republican" -- anyone to the left of Heinrich Himmler. 🤣 🤪 😂
The best part? As an influencer and trend-setter, we can expect MANY more nebbishes and nobodies suddenly mumbling about the need to spend more precious time with their families....
A 2025 Hannukah (Hanukkah, Chanu...) Miracle indeed! The story is a bit inverted, with her light miraculously going out rather than persisting, but I'm fine with it.
The Stefanik moment that stands out in my memory is her preening, posturing, screeching interrogation of the Presidents of Penn, Harvard and MIT about antisemitism. It was pure performance, for an audience of one, and incredibly hypocritical, given the current antisemitic tendencies of the Republican party.
Gee Paul, I'm really surprised you had already heard of "that story" having to do with oil unexpectedly lasting 8 days! You are really in the know! - Compliments from DJT
My eyes filled with wonder and joy when I read Stefanik was leaving politics! There really is a Santa Claus. I hope it is because she recovered her humanity but, let’s get real, I doubt it.
When I read something like this - humorous maybe , but factual - I cannot get my head around what is going on in the brains of people like this woman. How do you make intellectual (I use the word loosely) U-turns and not have your head explode?
Thank you Andy for this brilliant piece! I don’t know how Trump turns seemingly rational human beings into crack pots 😉I won’t miss her tantrums and her deplorable behavior 🙄. Harvard has inflicted many obnoxious pomposities on the hapless populace but it has also given us the gift of an Andy Borowitz ! 😉
I don’t know why this phrase doesn’t convey the exact opposite of the way it is currently used. Trump IS deranged, and Trump Derangement Syndrome is what Trump suffers from.
I live in her district. Her lies, name calling, and complete lack of touch with the needs and representation of this district are well known . Even her "newsletters" disappeared for weeks at a time. Not that they held much relevant content. Your summary is pretty spot on and I don't think for one minute we have heard the last from her☹️
This is true. Although she could dye her hair blond to be a good fit with faux"news". She would fit well into the Cabinet, maybe after Botox Barbie or Hogsbreath leave.
I always wonder whether any of these characterless politicians lean toward their bathroom mirror in the morning and intone "WTF am I really doing?" I mean, I must have had the best parents (it's not a religion that taught me right from wrong). My moral core has never shifted. I don't understand how her's (their's) can do so.
Not only is this a brilliant takedown of a political chameleon, but it is a history of Republican cowardice over the last 9 years. A classic--thank you.
Pope Leo was perhaps persuaded by the open letter from 1000 Catholic Church leaders and social justice advocates chastising him for supporting Trump. I was particularly disgusted by his fawning at the Alfred E Smith dinner.
I too am glad to see Dolan go. Mary Jo McConahay wrote an excellent book on right wing extremism in the USCCB. Pope Leo can pick other names straight from there.
apparently all prelates submit a resignation letter at the age of 75. The Pope chooses to accept some faster than others. On this one, he did not hesitate at all ... and given the successor, one imagines why he did not.
We in NY Dstrict 21 say "Good Riddens" to Elise. As my friend said, "Your bumper sticker has almost faded away." (It looks something like this eLIsES.) I can't wait to replace it/her.
She said she wants to spend more time with her family. But has anyone consulted her family?
Her family didn't live in the district when she was first elected. She probably never wanted to either. Her parents had a seasonal home. She has always lied to advance her career.
Is she resigning to join ICE? That’s about the only career move she has left…
She finally realized that she was skating on thin ICE!
Har!
Well, her son probably does want her to spend more time with him - he’s still too young to understand her crazy politics. Who knows about her gun-toting husband? But you raise a good point, Andy. We need an apolitical way for family members to assert their views on how much time they want to spend with these resigning politicians!
They all say that when they’ve behaved outrageously, been defeated and now it’s time to lick their wounds in private 🙄
Presenting: ACME Rent-a-Family! Choose your variety: Calm, Clueless, or Comatose. Includes the ACME Essentials Cute Child. Optional add-ons: the ACME Family Dog, the ACME Family Cat, and the ACME Family Bird ("beep, beep!"). For the holidays, ACME has marked down their Pictures 'n' Portraits Package: instant ancestry to hang on your walls for those so important photo ops. Get yours today! (ACME: the last word in reliable products!)
Anvil available at no extra charge.
explosives included for free - for the Acme family to self eliminate
Mine came with an ACME Andrew Giuliani Bratz Doll. I want my money back.
Presenting: the ACME Animated Lawyer Doll. Defends the rest of your dolls and figures, including Elf on the Shelf who has been accused of defamation. Actual legal knowledge not included.
thank you for this laugh!
🤣🤣🤣
Yeah. I'm sure. The holidays should be Merry and Bright at her house since she can just plug her brain into one of the sockets for the tree and light up the whole house.
Liked to the third power.
I see every maga-loving mother or father being responsible for years of future therapy needed by their children to re-hinge to reality and a sane way of life.
She has family? Do they know who she is? Seriously, what a POS.
I did. They all said they'd never heard of her.
:-D
You’re in top form! “Extinction level event known as DT”, “original recipe and extra crazy”, “septic tank of lies”! Hope Stefanik enjoys reading this masterpiece!
"Moderate Republican" -- anyone to the left of Heinrich Himmler. 🤣 🤪 😂
The best part? As an influencer and trend-setter, we can expect MANY more nebbishes and nobodies suddenly mumbling about the need to spend more precious time with their families....
Are you from Pittsburgh? Nebish is Pittsbughese. Great word.
Do we know whether she can actually read?
Reads like a geological anthropology:-)
A 2025 Hannukah (Hanukkah, Chanu...) Miracle indeed! The story is a bit inverted, with her light miraculously going out rather than persisting, but I'm fine with it.
And the outcome of her departure is more light for all of us!
The Stefanik moment that stands out in my memory is her preening, posturing, screeching interrogation of the Presidents of Penn, Harvard and MIT about antisemitism. It was pure performance, for an audience of one, and incredibly hypocritical, given the current antisemitic tendencies of the Republican party.
Gee Paul, I'm really surprised you had already heard of "that story" having to do with oil unexpectedly lasting 8 days! You are really in the know! - Compliments from DJT
Wow, what a gloriously scathing, bitingly funny summary of the rise & fall of Stefanik! So glad to see her go!
My eyes filled with wonder and joy when I read Stefanik was leaving politics! There really is a Santa Claus. I hope it is because she recovered her humanity but, let’s get real, I doubt it.
An inspired line- "My eyes were filled with wonder"- when the evening papers read...
When I read something like this - humorous maybe , but factual - I cannot get my head around what is going on in the brains of people like this woman. How do you make intellectual (I use the word loosely) U-turns and not have your head explode?
Ambition, lust for power, the prospect of turning the proximity to Trump into big dollars and opportunities.
Biblical, ain't it?
Indeed. Perhaps we're coming up on a Tower of Babel moment for Trump and company?
Haha- they live in the tower.
me too
How do we know her head didn't explode?
Have there been reports of Hazmat teams being called to the area? Just asking
Thank you Andy for this brilliant piece! I don’t know how Trump turns seemingly rational human beings into crack pots 😉I won’t miss her tantrums and her deplorable behavior 🙄. Harvard has inflicted many obnoxious pomposities on the hapless populace but it has also given us the gift of an Andy Borowitz ! 😉
TDS-Trump Derangement Syndrome, Pradnya. It's everywheres.
I don’t know why this phrase doesn’t convey the exact opposite of the way it is currently used. Trump IS deranged, and Trump Derangement Syndrome is what Trump suffers from.
When applied to Trump - should be Deranged Trump Syndrome"
I have a new name for Maga that is: The Magaloons! And their leader, the chief Magaloon Is the deranged Trump.
You mean to say the DT's - delirium tremens?
I live in her district. Her lies, name calling, and complete lack of touch with the needs and representation of this district are well known . Even her "newsletters" disappeared for weeks at a time. Not that they held much relevant content. Your summary is pretty spot on and I don't think for one minute we have heard the last from her☹️
Agree. The Stefanik’s of this country don’t just go quietly away. She’ll be back, more dangerous than before
I think she looked at the polls and realized Hochul was going to annihilate her.
and Trump was not going to support her in a primary with another Trumpie ... so a harder road without her resident Saint in her corner.
Right, the nuts and dangerous nuts find a way to come back. Please, people in her district, keep watch on her and report back on TRB.
Alise isn't blond enough for a spot on Fox but she qualifies in every other way or she is getting a Cabinet appointment.
This is true. Although she could dye her hair blond to be a good fit with faux"news". She would fit well into the Cabinet, maybe after Botox Barbie or Hogsbreath leave.
This is terrific, as usual. Thanks, Andy.
I always wonder whether any of these characterless politicians lean toward their bathroom mirror in the morning and intone "WTF am I really doing?" I mean, I must have had the best parents (it's not a religion that taught me right from wrong). My moral core has never shifted. I don't understand how her's (their's) can do so.
Stefanik 's ambitions overcame whatever moral core she might have had.
Not only is this a brilliant takedown of a political chameleon, but it is a history of Republican cowardice over the last 9 years. A classic--thank you.
Couple her departure with Cardinal Tim Dolan’s retirement. Only wish both came sooner.
I think Pope Leo pulled the plug on Dolan. He was coming across as a jolly fun-loving cleric with a nasty Nazi streak.
Pope Leo was perhaps persuaded by the open letter from 1000 Catholic Church leaders and social justice advocates chastising him for supporting Trump. I was particularly disgusted by his fawning at the Alfred E Smith dinner.
I too am glad to see Dolan go. Mary Jo McConahay wrote an excellent book on right wing extremism in the USCCB. Pope Leo can pick other names straight from there.
And years ago when Pope Francis came to town (NYC), Dolan made the celebration all about him. That’s when I started to lose respect for this cardinal.
apparently all prelates submit a resignation letter at the age of 75. The Pope chooses to accept some faster than others. On this one, he did not hesitate at all ... and given the successor, one imagines why he did not.
Original recipe and Extra Crazy... omg, you've outdone yourself! Dying laughing.....
Somewhere there is an Ai image of Ms. Stefanik in a white linen suit sporting a van Dyke.
A masterpiece!
Definitely worthy of 'Profiles in Ignorance'! Mayhap a sequel on the horizon?
As the saying goes: Good riddance to bad rubbish. Excellent takedown, Andy!
We in NY Dstrict 21 say "Good Riddens" to Elise. As my friend said, "Your bumper sticker has almost faded away." (It looks something like this eLIsES.) I can't wait to replace it/her.