😉Andy, Your satire is very sharp and mischievous this morning! 😂Now I feel so safe,😂 I can stop demanding gun-control like all sensible Americans! And when we, the people finally seize the ill gotten wealth of the Trump family , could we endow a charity for seashells? 😂💕
Because guns don't kill people. Seashells kill people. So support your right to bear personal MANPADS -- man-portable-air-defense-systems (not to be confused with Maxi Pads -- thems for libruhl sissies).
"if you took all the undocumented people who illegally voted since 1988 and multiplied by all the transgender athletes who played in any sport in 2025 your total would still be less than the 37,720 number of times Trump was mentioned in the Epstein Files."
First, they came for the seashells. I did nothing. Then they came for the seashore. I did nothing. Then they came for my sister - She sells seashells by the seashore. Then it was too late.
Andy’s posts mostly ARE true, just from a different angle. This one is a rare instance of complete fiction - and who knows: Don the Con might just decide to do this!
Drill small holes in each shell and send them to the White House; they can be held there until tRump gets sent to prison, where he can make necklaces and exchange them for Diet Cokes.
I've personally suffered with a form of sea shells all my life.....bone spurs...they prevented me from serving my country...but now I'm compensating, some say over compensating by leading as president.
I know this is supposed to be humor and I enjoy your comments daily but really when will all this madness end! I don’t just mean trump - the entire system is fucked when he is allowed to remain in office or in any capacity of influence. Has everyone gone crazy? We are supposed to be celebrating our anniversary of democracy but have nothing but chaos in government - the economy is about to collapse - the environment is being wrecked - all by a handful of people who care for nothing but their own asses. I’m 83 and beginning to look forward to dieing!
No need to apologize, Elaine ~ at one time or another, we've all been there. What helps me through is thinking, "the bigger the crime, the more gruesome the time." tRump wants to be remembered, and he will, just not the way he thinks it will go down.
President Donald Trump today signed his one millionth executive order naming everything in the world after himself. "Frankly", the president said, "this should have been done a long time ago."
I feel safer already
Starfish are next.
Seashells can themselves be fitted with nukes. Thus the story of _On the Beach_.
Obama continues to shellac trump, every day and in every way.
😉Andy, Your satire is very sharp and mischievous this morning! 😂Now I feel so safe,😂 I can stop demanding gun-control like all sensible Americans! And when we, the people finally seize the ill gotten wealth of the Trump family , could we endow a charity for seashells? 😂💕
Because guns don't kill people. Seashells kill people. So support your right to bear personal MANPADS -- man-portable-air-defense-systems (not to be confused with Maxi Pads -- thems for libruhl sissies).
Shore enuff I do, too!
She sells seashells by the seashore. And now she's on an "America's Most Wanted" poster.
Me too❣️ Thanks, Andy❣️😂😂😂
The Trump administration and Republicans will haul people into court over seashells but not sex crimes against children.
Department of Justice - Sea Shell Victims Unit. Coming soon to CBS!
DOJ-SSVU. Love it.
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
😆👏🏼😆👏🏼😆
starring the cast of Deadliest Catch, with guest appearances by Leonardo DiCaprio (because, you know, Titanic)
we need this meme!
It’s on Facebook, Crazy Eyes Kash Patel sitting at his desk with a conch to his ear.
has he heard anything newsworthy?
Yes-they’re serving cold beer at the Tiki Hut at 4pm
The DOJ is already Trumps "Special" Victims Unit. Since it's only job seems to be attacking anybody who scares him.
seen on Bluesky:
"if you took all the undocumented people who illegally voted since 1988 and multiplied by all the transgender athletes who played in any sport in 2025 your total would still be less than the 37,720 number of times Trump was mentioned in the Epstein Files."
Additionally, Trump has had more felony convictions than the amount of undocumented people convicted for voter fraud since 1988.
And soon it will out number the sea shells at the sea shore
Wow. Very good math. (Very bad truth.)
Sad but true
This is the part that makes me cry.
First, they came for the seashells. I did nothing. Then they came for the seashore. I did nothing. Then they came for my sister - She sells seashells by the seashore. Then it was too late.
Brilliant 👏 👏 👏
Nice!
Now that was bloody brilliant -- winner, winner, chicken dinner. 👏
what a juxtaposition, clever and on the money.
Profound actually
<snort laugh>
Sally is another sad American out of a job selling seashells by the seashore.
Tears are flowing.
Good one!
First they came for the seashells—and honestly, who had the courage to admit they weren't a little shell-shocked? 🙄
Felt compelled to write a haiku:
He banned all the shells.
The ocean kept making more.
Blue wave, undeterred. 🌊
Big Seashell intends to give him a big golden one with his name on it so they can once again sell seashells by the seashore...
The Golden Seashell Peace Prize!
Congressional Republicans praised the move, calling seashells “woke calcium.”
wonderful
<snicker>
😆😆😆
Bivalve brain with shrimp hands doesn’t realize that sea shells don’t kill people, people kill people!
excellent description of ConOLD
We spell seashells by the seashore….now a crime apparently.
What's really scary about this post, it sounds like it could be true.
Everything I write is true.
And remarkably prescient! 😂💕
Thanks, Andy. That was my belly laugh for the day.
Ditto
How often people forget that!!
Andy’s posts mostly ARE true, just from a different angle. This one is a rare instance of complete fiction - and who knows: Don the Con might just decide to do this!
What am I supposed to do with the dangerous seashells on my mantle????
It’s too late Ralph! ICE will be there with no knock fake warrants as they are undocumented and definitely immigrants possibly from shithole beaches.
Drill small holes in each shell and send them to the White House; they can be held there until tRump gets sent to prison, where he can make necklaces and exchange them for Diet Cokes.
I've heard there will be a special branch of ICE to collect the shells - the SSHIT team
I've personally suffered with a form of sea shells all my life.....bone spurs...they prevented me from serving my country...but now I'm compensating, some say over compensating by leading as president.
I know this is supposed to be humor and I enjoy your comments daily but really when will all this madness end! I don’t just mean trump - the entire system is fucked when he is allowed to remain in office or in any capacity of influence. Has everyone gone crazy? We are supposed to be celebrating our anniversary of democracy but have nothing but chaos in government - the economy is about to collapse - the environment is being wrecked - all by a handful of people who care for nothing but their own asses. I’m 83 and beginning to look forward to dieing!
Apologies for my tirade - don’t mean to bring everyone down.
Rest assured that many of us feel as you do, Elaine. No apology necessary.
I feel the same way you do, Elaine. I'm 65, by the way.
No need to apologize, Elaine ~ at one time or another, we've all been there. What helps me through is thinking, "the bigger the crime, the more gruesome the time." tRump wants to be remembered, and he will, just not the way he thinks it will go down.
Yikes! I'm going to clear all the seashells off my book shelves at home! Thanks for the warning, Andy!
This might have a surprise ending. Since Trump is just a shell of a man. And his house of cards are held together by shell companies.
<hehehe>
President Donald Trump today signed his one millionth executive order naming everything in the world after himself. "Frankly", the president said, "this should have been done a long time ago."
I believe the world will implode if that happens.