164 Comments
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Andy Borowitz's avatar

Speaking from experience, a major media corporation cancelled my contract for “financial reasons” in 2023—and that was the beginning of the most exciting chapter of my career, here with you wonderful people ❤️

Pradnya Sikand's avatar

Thank you Andy! Laughter is a powerful weapon and the best medicine for these times! It’s our brilliant satirists and comedians like Stephen Colbert and yourself who are on the front lines speaking truth to power! If Stephen is looking for a career change , he should take inspiration from Zelenskyy and run for President! 😂💕

It's Come To This's avatar

Stranger things have happened indeed! But then Putin would declare war on him.

Shannon Kincaid's avatar

😂👌🏻

Dan Starr's avatar

And that is when I canceled my subscription to that major corporation’s publication, also for purely financial reasons: the money I had been paying them was re-directed to a Borowitz Report subscription.

Terri's avatar

Thank you so much for being here. Winning battle by battle in the laughter war.

Mary Sue Palazzari's avatar

This morning it was more truth than satire!

Mark Lip's avatar

I've just send a message to watch Colbert's show tonight, "if only to boost the ratings" and to avoid CBS "...to take the ratings...and send a message".

Mark Lip's avatar

"Tank, not "take".

Stephanie MacLeod's avatar

Their loss was our gain. You and HCR were my first two Substacks, and have kept me sane. Loved seeing my two heroes together a week or so ago! Speaking of comedy and humor, if I lose my sense of humor, next winter, leave me out on the ice. Pyongyang does not have a thriving comedy scene, hilarious. Take my dictator, please!

Nadine Zdanovich's avatar

Heather Cox Richardson and Andy Borowitz were my first two Substack subscriptions too!

Bill Morgan's avatar

Andy. I like the New Yorker. One of the reasons I read both the hard copy and on-line was you. Never understood what the canceled you. Do you even know?

Andy Borowitz's avatar

I was told what Colbert was told.

Nadine Zdanovich's avatar

Their loss, our wonderful gain!

Wis's avatar

Don’t ever leave!

Joseph T. Babcock's avatar

And Andy we are happy you are here.

Concerned Citizen's avatar

And we are very glad you are here Andy! Thank you for all of your humor, which helps get us through the day of this asinine regime!

BL Whitford's avatar

Yes indeed. And we get vocabulary building along the way. Where else do we see commodious, quisling, and risible all in one post.

Andy Borowitz's avatar

I’m glad you found that ameliorating!

BL Whitford's avatar

I like icky, too.

Jerry Bier's avatar

Your comparison to GWB’s war on terror is spot on. The USA is too GREAT for Trump to fathom that any of his attempts to dominate and destroy America individualism and our appetite for laughter will fail as well.

It's Come To This's avatar

When Dump visited Scotland, I learned what cockwomble and scunner meant, on top of being pleased to find out "orange cunt" was mutually translatable from English to Scots Gaelic.

Mark D Olson's avatar

Don't forget indefatigably. I'm looking that up now!

Wendy Fredricks's avatar

I can’t decide if it’s the laughter or the high IQ required to create good comedy that irks Trump more.

Zija Pulp's avatar

It can’t be the high IQ; Trump is forever reminding us of his very high IQ.

Linda Mitchell, KCMO's avatar

High if one compares the Felon to a cestode worm.

Abby From Maine's avatar

I was thinking compared to a magat! (see what I did there?) :-D

Arlene Westhoven's avatar

The worm is smarter. But not from eating Trump's brain.

Lourdes Brown's avatar

I think he hates it when people use words he does not understand. :)

It's Come To This's avatar

ass-eh-toe-meeno-fen....

Jim Carmichael's avatar

Exactly! Colbert is for the long run; Drumpf is a dirty joke!

Paul's avatar

Rumps passing will be the laff heard 'round the world.

JudiLI's avatar

I know happily who is going to have the last laugh! Thanks Stephen, we’ll see you soon!

Merrill's avatar

White House spokesperson Steven Cheung posted: “Do not ever doubt President Trump and his political power. F*ck around, find out.”

Golden Rule's avatar

Cheung should, by now, realize that the real power lies with those who speak truth to dictators & liars & to all who laugh in agreement.

Kelly Rohrer's avatar

Yes Andy, laughter IS the best medicine. Thank you for your daily doses.

Lorenzo's avatar

He laughs best, who laughs last.

Zija Pulp's avatar

There’s nothing bullies hate more than being laughed at. Trump slots into the category perfectly.

Maria Becce's avatar

Andy - your tribute to laughter and Stephen Colbert is beautifully written. Thank you -

Mike Gelt's avatar

Apparently the quickest way to get Donald Trump angry is not a constitutional crisis, criminal conviction, or corruption scandal — it’s someone telling a joke about him. Nothing bruises his ego faster than laughter.

I thought Trump was already the worst president in modern American history — a man who has repeatedly shown contempt for ethics, democratic norms, and the rule of law, while being protected by congressional Republicans and a conservative Supreme Court willing to look the other way. But this newest deal to hand over $1.7 billion of taxpayer money into what appears to be a virtually unchecked slush fund is one of the most disgusting examples of potential graft and corruption the public has ever witnessed.

Americans work hard and pay their taxes expecting that money to support the public good — not to create massive pools of money with little oversight, weak accountability, and enormous potential for political favoritism, insider dealing, and personal enrichment. When guardrails are stripped away and transparency disappears, corruption flourishes. And far too many people believe this administration has repeatedly treated public office as a business opportunity rather than a sacred public trust.

No president should ever be allowed to operate above the law or beyond meaningful oversight. If any other public official attempted something this blatant, there would be nonstop investigations, hearings, and demands for accountability. The American people deserve answers, transparency, and ironclad protections to ensure taxpayer dollars are never turned into a vehicle for political patronage or personal gain.

But I’m sure we’re all supposed to believe that a man who sells sneakers, watches, NFTs, Bibles, and gold-plated merchandise would never see a billion-dollar taxpayer fund as a business opportunity. What could possibly go wrong?

From his convictions on 34 felony counts to efforts that critics argue would shield himself and his family from scrutiny and tax review, many Americans see him as the most self-centered, divisive, and openly prejudiced individual ever to hold the office of president.

Then again, if he reads this, he’ll probably claim the real national emergency is that somebody made fun of him on the internet.

Mark Lip's avatar

Well said. No worries, sadly he won't read this. I have to wonder if while in China, he was given tours of the factories that produced the above noted junk. Maybe tRump bobbleheads will appear soon, exempt from tariffs too!

H J L's avatar

Once again, you are right on target ! Trump has no moral compass and bankrupts everything he touches. Colbert will become an even bigger force as I hope he teams up again with John Stewart and pummels the Big Lying Trumpkin….

Walter David Luce's avatar

Andy's comments triggered my brain to muse: I do not remember EVER seeing Trump laugh, I mean a real laugh not his fake grin of glee after making other people suffer. Has anyone out there ever seen Trump laugh ????

Mark Lip's avatar

Along with things never seen, when entering a room that he'd just left, in the late 1980's, folks were miffed because, being a germaphobe he wouldn't shake anyone's hand! When he entered politics I was amazed to see that he was now shaking hands.

Janet W.'s avatar

Independents in news and comedy have been beneficial industry disrupters and have completely changed the media landscape. Legacy outlets (which generations after the Boomers never watch anyway) nailed their own coffins! Colbert will find joy in whatever it is he decides to do.

And lest we forget Volodymyr Zelenskyy was a comedian in his early days and that may well be a reason he is a global hero these days! He is also a lawyer but we'll save that for another day!

Kim Callahan's avatar

Your piece this morning was better than a breakfast pastry. As I was reading it I couldn’t help but wonder why in the world you weren’t still writing at the New Yorker. And then it all sunk in. The “War on Laughter” is something they will never win.

Andy Borowitz's avatar

I have a much larger audience now than I did at The New Yorker, and I can write things they would never publish in a million years. Colbert’s future is bright.

Sarah McAuliffe-Bellin's avatar

Less fattening too!

Steve Park's avatar

Trump is a pathetic figure who's incapable of laughter, in addition to being massively insecure. His extreme narcissism is a manifestation of that in my opinion. (My success in freshman Psych enabled me to make that conclusion)

Elaine Young's avatar

After you. Colbert was my daily reality check.