138 Comments
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Andy Borowitz's avatar

Be like Jane ♥️

Pradnya Sikand's avatar

Thank you Andy for this timely reminder. Jane Goodall was truly a remarkable human being. Your interview with her was one of your best . I often watch it when I need something positive and inspiring to start my day ! ❤️

It's Come To This's avatar

In her youth, Jane Goodall climbed trees to make a nest for herself to sleep in at night, just as the chimpanzees did, knowing leopards can (and do) climb trees at night to get their prey, so determined she was to understand the world they lived in.

The only threat Elon ever faced is the chilling realization that no woman in her right mind wants his sperm.

Annette's avatar

and those that have breed with him are not in their right minds, so he's decided they don't get to come to his "new" planet

It's Come To This's avatar

You couldn't pay me to occupy his planet, not even if you threw in some of his sperm as an added freebie.

Annette's avatar

ewwww... he should be neutered

Diane Smith's avatar

Reminds me of a clever quote from the recent past.

'In a world full of Donalds, be a Jimmy (Carter)'

Stephanie MacLeod's avatar

Jane is on my of all time heroes that, "I want to be when I grow up". I miss the thought that she is not still living among us, providing a balance in her own quiet, kind and intelligent way to the awful, strident, toxic voices. I hope, if she knew me, she would say that I did make a difference in a positive way. Thank you, Andy, for reminding us that her legacy is still in all of us that value her approach to life. And all is not lost. Poor Lindsey Graham-cracker, he was given the potential and gifts to be a great man, and he squandered them all, no redemption for him.

misia.d's avatar

Ha! Lindsey Graham Cracker!!! He hung out with lots of Marshmallows to be sure!

Stephanie MacLeod's avatar

Hah, he is no s'more!

Annette's avatar

<standing ovation> well played, Stephanie!

Lawrence Gottlieb's avatar

More proof positive of Musk's off the charts degeneracy.

What an evil, little schmuck!

Andy Borowitz's avatar

He doesn’t understand that no one wants him to reproduce. One is more than enough.

Jean Jacoby's avatar

Too late. He has more than a dozen spawn at this point (14?), but not all of them even like him. But Elon is free to send those who are willing, to Mars, on one of his SpaceX vehicles to start a colony if he wants. They can corner the best real estate near old river or lakebeds that maybe had water and life 3 billion years ago, and then hang out there in space suits with little radiation detection badges until the next wind storm blows them away.

misia.d's avatar

Great idea, I know of a family that’s interested in real estate that should be on the “first” rocket out because they are so important. They could easily become exportant!

Mary F Englebert's avatar

Not just in the "degeneracy" area. He's off the charts in insane, bonkers ideas for which WE have ended up footing all the bills while his fortune grows.

Carla Spackler's avatar

Cyclospora, Cybertruck, coincidence? I think not.

misia.d's avatar

Hopefully the kids are better looking than the cyber truck!

Jan Fabiyi's avatar

Does it not look like a picture a five-year-old might draw of a car?

Annette's avatar

yep . . . or a hearse

bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

The cybertruck is such an ugly vehicle. The only thing uglier is a cybertruck wrapped in advertising

Susan from OC's avatar

The cybertruck looks like the illegitimate offspring of a DeLorean and a Pontiac Aztek. A friend told me it reminds her of a garbage dumpster. My 9 year old grandson thinks they are "cool". Kids!!

Unsafely Anonymous's avatar

And all this has __nothing__ to do with the spike in popularity for the old Spitting Image song "I've never met a nice South African" last year.

No connection with DOGE, completely random coincidence.

Lorenzo's avatar

Jane Goodall vs. Elon Musk - humanity's finest vs. humanity's most perverse.

Annette's avatar

my money is on Jane . . . every. time.

Paul's avatar

Is that Dr Goodall pictured with Eric Trump as a child?

Andy Borowitz's avatar

Apologize to that chimp!

Judith Richards's avatar

Yes indeed. Poor chimp being mistaken for a Trump spawn. 🫣☹️😳

Annette's avatar

especially the dum(b) one

Susan Stone's avatar

My feeling exactly. That is the comment I would have made.

Gjay15's avatar

Shame on you. That “ child “ is lovable and will grow up to be a loving and responsible member of its family and community. Musk however?

Annette's avatar

Muskrat? Nope! He's neither loving or responsible.

Susan from OC's avatar

The chimp is much cuter!

AV's avatar

She was a national treasure. I miss her. 😪

Lawrence Gottlieb's avatar

Musk dreams of a 'Being John Malkovich' world filled with little Musks.

The little man is one diseased specimen.

Sharon P's avatar

all that money but no cure in sight for him

Lawrence Gottlieb's avatar

Society needs a vaccine to protect us FROM him & his ilk.

John LeBaron's avatar

On the scale of human decency, Jane Goodall and Elon Musk are at opposite poles. Thanks for this report.

Octavia Redwood's avatar

Focus on life, people, animals, trees, plants, mountains. oceans, deserts (ok maybe desserts, too) instead of Trump. Of course keep up, but focus on life, not DJT.

Anne Fletcher-Jones's avatar

Heh! Especially the desserts!

Susan Stone's avatar

I would choose the desert (where I live) over desserts any day. Deserts can be wonderful places when you understand them.

Stephen Brady's avatar

Melon Musk has demonstrated quite convincingly in the past 3 years that he is truly odious. He has done damage on a world scale and truly deserves a Mussolini moment.

misia.d's avatar

Yes, Mussolini had many memorable moments, including at the end.

Susan Stone's avatar

No wonder I don't care much for cantaloupes. And, now that I think of it, the flesh of muskmelons is orange, so his association with trump now makes perfect sense.

Irna Gadd's avatar

Simply by being himself and promoting his ideas, he’s ruined the planet, imho. One thing’s certain: he’s tried to provide enough people to populate a different planet all by himself. I feel for his many children and the impact he has on their emotional development.

Patty Farrington's avatar

I am in envy of your interview and meeting with such a troubadour for action and advocacy around the world. When I read about Roots and Shoots in "The Book of Hope," I was inspired by her ability to connect with young people, to help them appreciate the sheer vast beauty of earth and kickstart the mission to save this planet for posterity. I am in awe still, of the relentless force for good that she became and I am so grateful to you, Andy, for sharing her with us here. In a world of darkness, she's a beacon of hope!

Phil's avatar

Andy you punched me in the face! Woke me yes woke.

Will life ever be good for our children and grandchildren without people fighting for them now?

U b one of those.

Sheryl Frankel's avatar

Thank you Andy. She was certainly a gem!

Hank Greenspan's avatar

Of course, Musk attributes his own genocidal intentions to others . Not subtle.

Rosemary Ehle's avatar

And she lived to the age of 91 without missing a beat, leaving us in her sleep one nght.

Frank D Repp's avatar

If ignorance were bliss,Donny would be on Cjiud 9 in7th Heaven.