The Borowitz Report

The Borowitz Report

After Redactions Trump’s State of the Union to be Seventeen Seconds Long

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Andy Borowitz
Feb 24, 2026
∙ Paid
Bill Clark/CQ-Roll Call, Inc via Getty Images

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In an announcement that raised eyebrows among political observers, the White House announced on Tuesday that, after redactions, Donald J. Trump’s State of the Union Address would be only seventeen seconds long.

Trump’s original text of the speech had included lengthy praise of …

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