152 Comments
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Susan Moss's avatar

She looks even crazier in that 2013 photo.

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Andy Borowitz's avatar

Hard to believe, but yes!

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Alan's avatar
2hEdited

Andy, has Dorrinson uncovered the minimum IQ (insanity quotient) needed to be nominated to a cabinet or other high level position in this administration?

Between pet-u-lent Kristi, Peter pecker, viral Bobby and Justa, there's lots of competition!

Perhaps it's 1,500% higher than any other administrations in our nation's history? 🤔

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Susan Stone's avatar

Only 1500%?? Love your definition of IQ; it's perfect.

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Paul Ehrenzeller's avatar

1500% lower, they make us dumber when we have to listen to them!

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Alan's avatar

Regardless Paul, every member of the TBR community is over qualified for those positions.

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SUZANNE Marie McAdam's avatar

Alan, you really need to supply us with ideas for hat and T shirt

merch.

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Wis's avatar

She looks like a guest on Jerry springer. The “My neighbor killed my dog” episode. She’s the lunatic neighbor.

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Annette's avatar

<appreciative applause>

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D ODonnell's avatar

Perfect!

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

Or Maury Povich...

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Dick Shaw's avatar

And, she is crazy. Literally!

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Susan Moss's avatar

Agreed. And I am a retired psychotherapist who knows these things!🤣

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SUZANNE Marie McAdam's avatar

Susan, Our glorious ruler needs to be sent to

a nice, padded room, right?

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D ODonnell's avatar

Without a doubt

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

She looks crazy,but Noem was also recognizable as a woman of a certain age.

Her MAGA glow up gives Noem that scary Stepford politician look favored by the woman in Trump's harem, excuse me,cabinet.

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Lyn Toriello's avatar

I suppose just dance vance will be shaving his beard now.

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Gordon Shumway's avatar

yes, Kegsbreath wants no "beardos".....but what to do about "fat general" tRump?

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Jerr's avatar

"General" no way is that tub of lard a General, I like Cadet Bonespurs.

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D ODonnell's avatar

We all need to bring back “Cadet Bonespurs.”

“Dementia Don” was big on Twitter for quite a while.

There is no X.

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Judith Green's avatar

lol

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Judy Sherwood's avatar

Pentagon Petey said NO Beardos! Start shaving JD. And NO Fastsos... how 'bout that DJT.

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misia.d's avatar

Beardo Vance, yeah.

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Sam Popkin's avatar

First they came for my implants….

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Gary Farrar's avatar

They are eating my lipstick!

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Punkette's avatar

Lol! 😆

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Christina Johnson's avatar

Good one!

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Enid's avatar

Yet again, Andy, you knocked it out of the park (Go, Sox!). Thank you.

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Sean M Carlin's avatar

Maybe she will copy her star employee, Tom Homan and pick up a few bags of cash.

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Judith Richards's avatar

I thought Kristi Gnome's star employee (or professional advisor)was the guy she's been having an affair with for years. He had to pay a $1000 fine and 50 hours of community service AND 8 hours of impulse control counseling in 2022. They sound perfect for each other.

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Annette's avatar

Ah, Corey Lewandowski, another fine representative of the tRump psycophants.

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Susan Stone's avatar

How do you know these things? I'm glad to find out who it is, and it seems like she's keeping very appropriate company.

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Annette's avatar

and learn to mumble incoherently

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Catherine Alvarez's avatar

I have a floor mop that looks like that .

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Stephen Brady's avatar

I thought you were going to tell us that JD would have to take a step down from molesting couches to barcaloungers.

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Judith Richards's avatar

🤣🤣🤣

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Hank Greenspan's avatar

There's more to this. Noem is actually Stephen Miller in drag.

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Wis's avatar

THAT’S why the extensions are so important to her! And that’s why she (he) applies a half inch layer of makeup every day! Seriously, have they ever been seen together at the same time? 😉

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Hank Greenspan's avatar

Exactly. BTW, she is also Tom Homan in drag.

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Annette's avatar

I knew it!! I just knew it had to be true!

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Hank Greenspan's avatar

As they say, "there's no face like gnome."

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Annette's avatar

well played, Sir!

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Samuel Coulbourn's avatar

What a ghastly image!

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DEBORAH SIMON's avatar

The horror,the horror

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Elizabeth's avatar

She’s so weird.

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Denis Pombriant's avatar

Let's be real, Noem has been over extended for a long time.

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Wis's avatar

When Kristi can’t afford the makeup she trowels on every morning, she’ll be *really* pissed.

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Michael L Flynn's avatar

Considering the gnome only wears lead-based make-up produced in some underdeveloped country, the tariffs have got to be bankrupting her; despite the fact that she buys it by the 55-gallon drum.

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Susan Stone's avatar

Maybe she could raid trump's supply?

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Wis's avatar

😂. I always think of his as spray-on traffic cone orange. She has some pocks that I think she’s attempting to fill in with mortar-like foundation.

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Susan Stone's avatar

Traffic cone orange - perfect. I did not know about her pocks, so thank you for that important information.

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Wis's avatar

If you look closely at her face, it’s not smooth. Though the mortar does do some filling in. 😉

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Susan Stone's avatar

Looking at the two photos Andy posted, her face doesn't look bad. I tried looking at other photos, too, and her face doesn't look that bad. She must be extremely vain. (IMO)

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Jim Dygert's avatar

Thanks a lot! Now I have the before and after image of that wench burned inside my brain! As Bluto Blutarsky on Animal House once famously said..”My advice to you is to drink heavily “

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Paulette Edelson's avatar

Senator blutarsky

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Bud Priba's avatar

Or possibly the brown buffalo

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Maria Jette's avatar

It’s startling to see how human she used to look!

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Maria Jette's avatar

Anyone looking for something more bloodcurdling on La Noem might “enjoy” NYMag’s big piece on her and her sinister no-we’re-not-a-couple boyfriend, Cory Lewandowski. I was literally just reading it (in a hard copy!) as Andy’s soothing post popped up: https://nymag.com/intelligencer/article/kristi-noem-corey-lewandowski-dhs-fema-trump-enforcers.html

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Meighan Corbett's avatar

I have long loved NY Mag.

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Susan Stone's avatar

Too bad one has to be a subscriber to read that article.

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Annette's avatar

have you seen Kimberly Gargoyle's early looks?

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Sharon P's avatar

and to think she could have afforded a REAL plastic surgeon

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Peter Scott's avatar

…thank God, no.

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Marilyn Gillis's avatar

There was a very misleading part of the story that said Noem is like Trump but without the empathy. Trump has ZERO empathy and to suggest he might have even a nano particle of empathy is a gross suggestion.

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Susan Stone's avatar

Marilyn, IMO what Andy was saying is that Noem has even less empathy than trump who has none. I don't think there was any implication that trump has even an iota of empathy.

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Sharon English's avatar

Their concerns about trans/drag people seems odd given the makeup by trump, eyeliner on VP, Noem's whatever look with "do pouty for me", and the Secy of War cosmetics. Geez.

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