262 Comments
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Derek Smith's avatar

Well, my hands are shaky, and my knees are weak

I can't seem to stand on my own two feet

Who do you thank when you have such luck?

I'm in love, I'm all shook up

Mm, ooh, yeah, yeah-yay

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JAMES LEE FLEMING's avatar

Wait a minute: you’re not mixing a little Eminem in the “King’s English” are you?

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AVee. (Alexia)'s avatar

M & Ms with peanuts please!!!

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Annette's avatar

I suddenly have a hankering for a peanut butter and 'nana sangwich.

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AVee. (Alexia)'s avatar

I can’t go near M&Ms

except for the tiny bags.

I could OD on them!!

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NEAL O'CONNOR's avatar

"Fry me up a sangwidge, please!"

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marlyg's avatar

Peanut butter for me please!

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nks's avatar

Fell off my chair laughing at this😂😂. Ice unmasked in Memphis!

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Vicki Bacal's avatar

Of course, those ICE agents are all staying at the Heartbreak Hotel down on Lonely Street.

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bitchybitchybitchy's avatar

And they're so lonely they could die/cry

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Vicki Bacal's avatar

Maybe cuz they miss their babies.

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Annette's avatar

Uh huh!

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JeffJ's avatar

Andy has proven it again: he is one hunka hunka burnin’ love!

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Barbara Longbrook's avatar

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Michael L Flynn's avatar

Does tRump own that? I thought they were only allowed to stay at tRump-owned properties; where we, the taxpayers, foot the bill.

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Joanne Rossmassler Fritz's avatar

Andy, this is perfect. Thank you for consistently making us laugh when we really want to cry.

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Catharine Farkas's avatar

Ain't it the truth!

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EJN's avatar

Nicely said…

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Sarah McAuliffe-Bellin's avatar

This is excellent. The first piece I open in the morning and it doesn’t make me blue!

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Bill Williamson's avatar

How bout your shoes? 🤣🤣🤣

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Susan Stone's avatar

Suede, of course. Right?

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Bill Williamson's avatar

Of course.

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Marc Panaye's avatar

"ICE Goes Undercover in Memphis"

The Devil in Disguise?

Suspicious minds?

End of the Road?

Spanish Eyes?

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Frances López's avatar

Fools Rush In

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Annette's avatar

<golf clap>

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Bill Williamson's avatar

🤣🤣🤣

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Marmo's avatar

Ain't that the truth, Frences Lopez! 🤣

(And it's also the theme of every cabinet meeting.)

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Laura F. Pasik's avatar

Jailhouse Rock!!

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Marmo's avatar

We're still waiting for Jailhouse Rock, Laura F. Pasik - wishing and hoping and praying!

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Marmo's avatar

Good one, Marc Panaye!

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

And Spanish Eyes get deported.

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Tina Stein's avatar

His face definitely looks like he had a stroke.

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Andy Borowitz's avatar

Many!

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Susan Stone's avatar

Seriously, the other thing that can do that is a TIA (transient ischemic attack), which as I remember, affects only the face. TIAs are also known as mini strokes.

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Mary Gilbert's avatar

I believe a TIA can affect other parts of the body. Any neurologists want to weigh in?

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Susan Stone's avatar

Mary, apparently my information is very old. I just googled TIAs and in reality they are a temporary stroke - the symptoms go away quickly, and treatment is not needed. For a stroke, treatment is required. A TIA can result in a stroke within hours, days or months.

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Harvey Perry's avatar

Cerebral incidents

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Penny Pawl's avatar

and he is in pain I hope

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Jim Dygert's avatar

And it appears by the photo they just left the McDonald’s in the top right corner! How appropriate!

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Bill Alstrom (MA/Maine/MA)'s avatar

Andy, thank you so much. This is the balance my email inbox needs.

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Mary Gilbert's avatar

Great comment Bill-right on target!

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Sam Popkin's avatar

Hoping the whole lot of them will be dancing to the jail house rock one day soon.

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It's Come To This's avatar

"If I see nothin' but a hound dog, I will shoot it." 🤣 Right in the middle of the shitstorm, Andy still manages to make me laugh out loud in the mornings....

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Patty Bohart's avatar

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

One of your most hilarious feats yet, Andy!

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Ann Panda's avatar

Thanks, Andy! I needed that!

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Nicole Barenbaum's avatar

Hilarious! I was laughing quietly to myself until the last line, but Kristi Noem's stern warning to "something that appears to be nothing but a houndog" made me burst out with a great guffaw! Thank you for this, Andy--I'm going to bring it to an ICE protest today for some comic relief!

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Dick Shaw's avatar

OMG, that’s hilarious Andy.

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Linda Andres's avatar

I can definitely picture trump in one of those costumes, with his unique hand movements as the music plays.

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Marc Panaye's avatar

I can't for Elvis never did the YMCA shuffle.......

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AVee. (Alexia)'s avatar

Or dance like he was milking cows mid-air with his hands!😵‍💫

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Annette's avatar

<giggle>

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AVee. (Alexia)'s avatar

I just don’t know what you mean….wink

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Sharon P's avatar

no not cows you know.... the other thing

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Bill Williamson's avatar

That's udderly funny. 🤣🤣🤣

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Annette's avatar

omg, that's an image I can't get out of my mind now . . . yuck!

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Michael L Flynn's avatar

He's such a hunka, hunka burnin' slug.

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